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Horton Gets His Spot In The Parade

By Mack Rawden: 2008-11-25 00:37:18
Horton Gets His Spot In The Parade You know who’s constantly talked about but still underrated? Dr. Seuss. The man was like the Charlie Kaufman of his day, eccentric, unpredictable and always fascinating. You know what else is constantly talked about but still underrated? Thanksgiving--specifically, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. I know I’m kind of a cynical douche bag a lot, but socializing with family, gorging yourself on scalloped corn and overcooked meat, and watching obnoxiously large cartoon characters float by is just fun for everyone involved---just like Dr. Seuss. Someone should really bring them together. Hmmm…

In what can only be called a magical, unexpected present from Zeus himself, Macy’s just announced Dr. Seuss’ Horton from Horton Hears A Who! will be getting his own gigantic balloon at this year’s parade. In a related story, I will be overpowering the Triptophan attacking my body in a desperate attempt to stay awake long enough to see this.

My good friend, actor Jared Flahaven, once said, “Chili and fudge are two great things that don’t go together---kind of like women and the vote.” I guarantee he’d approve of this epic combination.

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