Standing amidst the shadowy, bulbous conglomerates, Cinema Blend is the movie site for the dreamers, the visionaries and the unusuals---the rebels who eat, sleep and complain about movies in their own pace and language. In an age where most barter for the eighth floor penthouse at the expense of their pets, we’d rather stick it out on the first floor where it’s easier to get away with raucous parties, questionable viewpoints and genuine originality.
Fiercely independent, zealously opinionated and all-too-willing to try the occasional hairbrain scheme or unconventional idea, we’ve spent the last eight years sticking with its own grace, style and facial hair choices. I guess we’re kind of like Jeffrey The Dude Lebowski in that way, except, you know, we always show up for work.
You'd like to syndicate our work, wouldn't you? Of course you would. You have taste, style and charm. You're also in luck. We have affordable and easy-to-use plans that let you reprint our content in your newspaper, website, or newsletter. Just contact Josh for more information.
Want to advertise on the site? Please contact Gorilla Nation for ad rates, packages and general advertising information.
Want to write for us? Go here for a listing of current openings.
Josh Tyler
Title: Head Honcho/Editor In Chief E-mail:
Known To Say: "Needs more Shatner!"
A Lie: On weekends Josh drapes himself in flannel and goes door to door crushing people's hopes and dreams.
Known To Say: "It's kind of like a cheesy Vegas show, like Siegfried & Roy or Wayne Newton: It's silly, it's over-the-top, you're miserable, your Mom made you come, but you spent the whole time trying to hide the smile on your face. Don't worry, you're safe here. We never have to speak of this again. When it comes out on DVD, you're invited to my sing-along viewing party."
A Lie: Katey was the real-life inspiration for Lawrence of Arabia.
Known To Say: "Seeing someone’s entrails slowly spill out, as they scream and crawl across a blood-drenched beach, is simply repulsive."
Kelly West
Title: TV Editor
E-mail:
Known To Say: "In addition to desperately wanting to dig in to one of Ned's delicious looking pies, I also wouldn't mind having Jim Dale follow me around for a few days, narrating even the most mundane details of my life."
A Lie: Kelly has received multiple job offers from Seattle Grace Hospital, Mode Magazine, DHARMA, Dunder Mifflin and Primatech Paper Company but turned them all down in order to devote more time to Cinema Blend.
A Lie: David Wharton is the subject of the 2012 Mayan doomsday prophecy.
Tim Gomez
Title: Staff Writer
E-mail:
Known To Say: "At this rate, every single horror movie made before the 21st century is going to be remade by the end of 2010, even the ones no one cared about in the first place."
A Lie: Once had a drunken conversation with Ernest Hemingway just prior to Hemingway writing The Sun Also Rises. Coincidence? Maybe. But probably not.
Known To Say: "Who needs a karaoke machine when you could have Mamma Mia! on DVD?"
A Lie: Perri recently won $10 million from a scratch-off lottery card. She bought a lifetime supply of One A Day gummy vitamins, Vern Troyer and hopes to make InGen’s DNA extraction process a reality.
Known To Say: "Welcome Lex, please stick around and scheme a bit."
A Lie: Steve invented a 32-nanometer chip in 1997, but decided there was no need for it. Technology has since been at a near standstill compared to it's potential. Steve currently writes for Cinema Blend as penance for "impeding necessary technological advancements.
A Lie: Brian's life accomplishments include being the first man to reach the summit of Mount Everest backwards. He attributes his feat mostly to the usage of helium instead of oxygen and also elected to apply moon shoes as an alternative to Italian OneSports.
A Lie: Trevor was once a nationally ranked solitaire player, but left the game when the burden of fame proved to heavy. Shamed and disgraced, he fled his homeland and now raises pandas for pets or food.
Known To Say: "I plan on raising my kids in a seedy environment of second hand smoke, swearing, and gradual disappointment. The type of place where only artists and madmen thrive and the sane ooze into debauchery."
A Lie: Mack is the byproduct of a passionate one night stand between Michael O'Donoghue and Adam's first wife Lilith. He legally divorced his parents at sixteen after both panned his first novel, Madame Ovary, as being "largely uninspired" and "a bit juvenile." It was never published.
Known To Say: "Ridley was always be 'Ridley', the dude was a bad ass director when he was doing TV commercials in the early 70's.....Paul Anderson will always be the director of Mortal Kombat."
Dustin Christian
Title: TV Writer
Known To Say: "Good luck to you, Jason Mesnick, in your very very public search for love. May you find what almost no other contestant on these shows has found, but you best stop making googly eyes at my woman. I'll be watching you, Mesnick."
Known To Say: "Who says TV isn't good for kids? I knew a girl who stayed in high school because she saw the prom episode of Beverly Hills, 90210."
Charmaine Dennis
Title: TV Writer
Known To Say: "JC feels a little funny watching white dudes booty shakin'. Don't
know why; they were really good, on par with a lot of club girls I've seen. Oh, maybe that's why."
Known To Say: "Juxtaposing Tom Petty's voice with Mike Campbell's guitar rifts is like having sex between Egyptian cotton sheets—it may not be the most technically astounding collaboration, but it sure fucking feels good."
Scott Gwin
Title: Movies Writer / Box Office Guru
Known To Say: "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo has been hailed by some as Rob Schneider's funniest movie. Please bear in mind, that's kind of like saying "She Bangs" is William Hung's best song."
Brian Holcomb
Title: DVD Critic
Known To Say: "Of course we want to see the man drawn and quartered; hopefully in great detail."
Andy Keener
Title: Games Writer
Known To Say: "The Chris Rock impression is both laughable and kinda sad; it's a great impression of a man impersonating Chris Rock, but it's a horrible Chris Rock."
Rich Knight
Title: Games/DVD Writer
Known To Say: "Crescent Galaxy and Primal Rage...rounded out the system as "good games." And if those were the "good games", I'd hate to play the "bad" ones. Do the Math, dude, you + Jaguar = loser."
Amanda Krill
Title: TV Writer
Known To Say: "Donald Trump is officially more evil than viagra which is a yuge statement."
Emily McDonald
Title: Movies Writer
Known To Say: "Amy Adams getting sucked into the Meg Ryan vortex troubles me."
J.D. McNamara
Title: DVD Critic
Known To Say: "And just in case you're keeping score, Beckham gets the nod for better hair as well."
Doug Norrie
Title: TV Writer
Known To Say: "I avoid awkwardness at every turn. I tend to watch one-third of Idol on mute because the conversations become so unbearable as to make my skin crawl"
Known To Say: "It’s like what you get at Jamba Juice, but cheaper and not quite as healthy."
Ryan Rigney
Title: Games Writer
Known To Say: "Why would I take on a monstrous, club-wielding guard using a stick when I could instead hobo-stab him 97 times with my shiny space-daggers?"
Jarad Wilk
Title: DVD Critic
Known To Say: "Trust me when I say that getting a colonic in some corner deli with flickering lights, rusty equipment, and rats running around seems more appealing than sitting through this farce."
This site is operated by Cinema Blend LLC. For advertising inquiries, contact Gorilla Nation. CinemaBlend.com is a private, independently owned website which is intended only as entertainment. The views expressed on this website may or may not reflect those of its owner. Don't take us too seriously.