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The Film Habit #13 - July 22, 2004 Hey folks, thanks for dropping back in for another week. A few worthwhile things in this little piece of weekly therapy, a few not. Read it anyway and remember that the most important movie in the next few months is called Open Water and you have to see it. Keep that in your head until sometime in August when it shows up. Also, SHARKS! Not land ones sadly. Those have been unjustly relegated to the crappy cartoon bin at Wal-Mart. You know the one where they just dump the DVD’s in haphazardly because they know no one will buy it except confused children with welfare money? Yeah that one.
The Temperature at which Interest Wanes As you may have noticed, we never reviewed Fahrenheit 9/11. Are we part of some vast right-wing conspiracy to crush Michael Moore? No, but give me a couple million and I could be. Or if Michael Moore gives me a couple mill I’ll be happy to help him bash Bush. Sadly, the impoverished truth is that I just never got around to seeing it. When I finally did it was two weeks after its release, interest had died down, and I just never had time to put together a proper review. For awhile I felt compelled to write something, almost as if it was my duty to spout off about Michael Moore and his politically promotional masterpiece. Then I stopped and used my head. Duty? What was I thinking? It’s not that important. Sad fact is, if we don’t get a review up for a movie within a couple of weeks people don’t bother to read it. That applies to record breaking propaganda-mentaries as much as it does to high seas adventures starring Russell Crowe. From time to time big movies slip through the cracks here at CB. Not often, but it happens and why should F911 get special crack retrieval privileges? If anything, in cinematic terms it is less important, except by route of the fact that it made a surprising amount of money, driven purely on the wings of political partisanship. I’m finally in a place where I realize I don’t have to review it. It’s not like The Passion where the controversy is about the content. We all KNOW what this Michael Moore movie is about. The controversy is in whether or not people should see it and my stance is always that people should see whatever the hell they want. I don’t need to write a long winded review to say that, when my time could be better spent reviewing something current, like Pizza the Movie (Sorry guys I will find time to get that review up, I swear!).  Besides, I hate politics. I’m sick of hearing about it and fighting with people about it, and worrying that I might say the wrong thing and send a good friend on the message board into a politically motivated tizzy. People latch onto it with a psychotic, religious-like fervor that’s just saddening. In the end your political devotion does nothing but divide us all and that’s not what I want from movies. Remember when they used to bring us all together? Moore is an obviously talented filmmaker, I’m happy for now to leave it at that, at least until it’s more worthwhile to really dive into it… politics free of course.
Will we review F911? Someday. If nothing else, I’ll have a word or two about it when the DVD comes out. Am I pro-Moore or anti-Moore? You may never know. Heck, when did people begin dividing the world up based on whether or not they like a mildly funny fat guy from Michigan? Unlike some people I still realize that I’m a film critic, not a political activist, I hate it that the two have become so mixed. me to talk about Michael Moore’s baseball caps. Singed Biosphere  A lot of folks are running around these days hiding behind free speech as an excuse to be royal assholes. We’ve had our share of them spouting off on the CB Forum lately. What they forget is that while free speech is a good thing, free speech is not without consequences. If you’re a jerk, expect to get punched in the face. If you’re a jerk on my property, expect to get thrown the hell out. This is my place; let me show you my impression of Uncle Phil. You be Jazz. Er, I guess Rafe can be the Fresh Prince, maybe Bill can be Carlton or Jeffrey… I’m not sure where I was going with all that. But while everyone is entitled to free speech, I’m not required to give you a place to exercise it. You want to be a troll? You’re free to do so. Just remember, that as long as you’re under my roof, I’m just as free to give you the heave ho. Actions bring consequences. I suspect even Michael Moore or his good buddy Mayor McCheese would agree with that.
Get punched in the face on The CB Forum What to Watch New movies come out each week. I don’t see all of them, but still feel qualified to tell you which movie you should watch. Feed your film habit from my picks. Two major releases this weekend and one limited import, but only one is worth your precious time. A lot of people still seem to be convinced that Catwoman is the big movie opening this weekend. I even heard some theaters are doing midnight showings. I’m tempted to go to one, just to see what sort of movie-goers show up. Perhaps people who missed Spider-Man 2 and thought they’d settle for next best? Surprise! This isn’t it. Certainly people who haven’t seen the trailers, because well… Catwoman rides a super-cool motorcycle. What else do you need to know? Lions Gate is re-releasing a Japanese import this weekend, called Ju-On. It’s getting pushed only as a way to cash in on the imminent remake coming out a bit later. Those of you who love this sort of Japanese creepy stuff will already be seeing it, so you don’t need my take on it. Those of you who don’t won’t, so let’s move on to the only movie being released this week that matters.  The Bourne Supremacy hits theaters on Friday and is being projected to happily trounce the much hyped Catwoman by clawing to number one. Granted, Matt Damon didn’t get approved by Oprah, but then she’s really only good for giving advice on books. I’d forgotten how much I flat out enjoyed the original Bourne Identity a few years ago, and required a DVD re-spin to wake up my interest. It works. Bourne Identity really works. Though they’ve picked up a different director, all the pieces are still there for this thing to work again… and in a couple years, probably again. Sequels happen. But this is the weekend where Matt Damon officially takes over as the Alpha male in the whole Affleck/Damon affair. Please, someone keep him away from extra curvy, ex-fly-girls. This weekend make it a point to head out and see The Bourne Supremacy.
Hey! Do you like working for free? Are you over 18? Do you secretly wish you could live the wild and exciting life of Michael Brody? You’re in luck. CinemaBlend.com is looking for writers, specifically the type interested in slogging it out on DVD’s or those with a flair for internet news stories. If you think you can capture the signature Cinema Blend style as a DVD critic and/or BNN reporter send me an with a few samples and we’ll talk. |
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