GTA 5: The Unluckiest Player Ever

By William Usher 2014-04-07 23:43:03 discussion comments
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New video footage has been making the rounds on the internet for one of the most unlucky players of all time. He's enjoying his online game; playing to be the best; setting them up and knocking them down. That is, until he gets hit with a streak of some unwelcoming sour luck.

YouTube user Merlin Murat recently dropped a 35 second video that features nothing but bad luck. It's so bad it's actually funny. In fact, let's all share in the hilarity of this guy's unfortunately bad luck by viewing his misfortunes and then laughing at him at full volume. Behold:



Now that is one unlucky S.O.B. I'm betting when he came out of the womb the doctor must have missed let him slip out onto the floor and under a ladder while a nurse's pet black cat ran by. This guy seemed to have the sort of wobbly leg structure of Anderson “The Spider” Silva following his match with Chris Weidman.

For a while you just wanted to yell at the screen “Stand up and take it like a man!”

Although, most men would have been a puddle of liquid flesh-good after the airplane door came down and married some skull to pavement, just until death did them apart after the whole thing went ka-boom and his remains slid across the hangar like a human bowling ball.

Nevertheless, there's a lesson in all of this: don't try to imitate what you see in rap videos in Grand Theft Auto: Online. First up, you need eye-candy, and he was missing it. Next up, you have to be in control of the car you drive... you can't let it drive all over you. Third, when you're recording near an expensive Learjet that you otherwise couldn't afford in real-life, make sure you're not trying to be a human condom for the door.

On the flipside, at least there's a much more positive video courtesy of the Unspoken Ouch, who gives us a fanciful view of Los Santos as some kind of pervy, voyeuristic tourist. Still, the combination of the scenery with the music is just top notch. He does a superb job of making GTA V look a lot less like a playground of piss-poor luck for piss-poor players. Check it out below.



Dang, the only thing I could think about while watching that was “This would look a heck of a lot more realistic if this were on PC with iCEnhancer mods.”

Still, it was good for what it was and nice alternative to all that death we witnessed in the video near the top.

If you're still in the mood for more carnage, feel free to check out this plane-to-plane stunt here or some neat trailer recreations here.
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