A Skwerl Pays The Price For 'Chinese Democracy'

Kevin Skwerl thought he was dope; he thought, “Yeah, my last name may sound like ‘Squirrel,’ but this is gonna make up for all the acorns thrown at me in 4th grade.” He thought he could get away with the biggest coup of the music industry since Shawn Fanning started Napster.

For those of you still obsessing over Lil Wayne’s new album, Skwerl delivered to the masses Chinese Democracy, the most long-awaited album of our time. (Again, for those not keeping track, Rage Against the Machine released Renegades eight years ago, i.e. less than 14). But, Mr. Skwerl had to pay the price.

According to RollingStone.com, two FBI agents intruded at his day job this week to inquire as to how the little rodent got his hands on Axl Rose’s baby. Apparently, the web designer who used to be an employee of Universal Music’s distribution department received the sacred tracks from “an anonymous online source”. Because that’s what IM buddies do…?

Despite cleverly deleting the original files and attributing their nonexistence to the insistence of Axl Rose’s attorneys, Skwerl still has to endure the fact that, should Axl ever get over himself and release Chinese Democracy, Skwerl will never be invited backstage. He will forever be the blogger version of Slash, minus the talent, the women, the hair, the legacy. But, at least he made up for sharing a last name with overgrown rats that trapeze between telephone poles. Cheers, Mr Skwerl.