Aerosmith Abandons Gig, Gets Sued

Before I present you with the facts of this litigation commotion, it’s important to note the following: almost every detail of this news story is completely absurd; somehow, it’s all true though. Boston-based band Aerosmith is being sued by its own fans for what could amount to over twenty-million dollars. The hoopla stems from a cancelled concert in Hawaii. The venue? The Maui War Memorial. Nice effort, guys. Maybe you’d like to cancel upcoming gigs at Ground Zero and Andersonville too. That would certainly help your public relations department.

According to Music-News, the suit is being brought by attorney Sleaze Roxx. Now, there’s a name you can trust. The move came as quite a surprise to me, as I expected the local litigants to go with Roxx’s fierce rival Underhanded McTrickerstein or maybe the dark horse candidate Thefty Unseemwitcz. It’s hard to predict these things. The majority of those filing lawsuits are seeking damages to pay for booked hotel rooms and airline flights. Apparently, spending a few days in Maui just wasn’t the same without hearing “Love In An Elavator.”