Bill Cosby Pens New Album

Dr. Healthcliff Huxtable. Somehow, the only man on the planet who raised a well-to-do family of five without using a single curse, scream or belt buckle. Not even when Vanessa said she was sleeping over at a friends in the neighborhood only to drive down to Maryland for a concert and have said friend’s car stolen from a diner parking lot on the way. Not even when Theo once came home with straight D’s prompting Daddy Hux to teach him the ways of adult spending with Monopoly money. No, not even when Rudy stole those few dollars from Claire’s purse to buy that light-up sweater from the mall that ended up not working anyway. Clearly – someone spent a significant chunk of childhood plopped down in front of the Cosby’s.

Huxtable, nee Bill Cosby, is keeping with his washed up, life-affirming lessons by releasing his first album, Cosby Narratives Vol. 1: State of Emergency due in stores next month. Though unfortunately (I use that loosely) Cosby is not rapping or singing himself, he has asked for the help of such talents as SupaNova Slom, Jace the Great and Brother Hahz.

Riiiiiight.

Cosby, who co-wrote and executive produced the disc, is said to have used influences from jazz, pop and hip-hop. Taking after Will Smith’s anti-curse rap route, Cosby’s album promises no “profanity, misogyny, violence and braggadocio" in describing “life in the 21st century.” Wow, much like your 80s sitcom fatherly duties, that takes some real talent there Dr. Hux. Personally, I couldn’t possibly describe anything past 1994 without a “dirty skank bitch ass hoe bag” thrown in there somewhere, but to each his own.