Coldplay Unleashes Album Info

Having run out of ways to describe their shitty, overly emotional piano noise, Coldplay has turned to a foreign language, desperate to find the perfect title for their new album. Viva La Vida, meaning “Live The Life” or “Emo Piano Chord” depending on translation, will hit stores on June 17th, thanks to their friends over at Capitol Records.

According to Billboard, the disc was produced by acclaimed behind-the-scenes master Brian Eno, as well as Markus Dravs. The group’s manager Dave Holmes (nope...not the chubby MTV guy who finished second on Who Wants To Be A VJ?) previously described the LP, saying it “definitely takes them in some different directions.” Good. I’m sick of hearing people describe records as “Coldplayish” and intuitively knowing exactly what that means.