Have you ever wondered where people get the inspiration for some of the music (if you can call it that)? Well, to put an end to the media’s guessing and speculation, Billboard mainstay, Katy Perry revealed to sources at Starpulse.com that she was inspired to pen “I Kissed a Girl” when she caught sight of a picture of the luscious Scarlett Johansson. Isn’t that just quaint and cute? Says Perry, “I opened up a magazine and I saw a picture of Scarlett Johansson. I was with my boyfriend at the time, and I said to him, 'I'm not going to lie: If Scarlett Johansson walked into the room and wanted to make out with me, I would make out with her. I hope you're okay with that?’” Doesn’t she just sound like the cutest little bi-curious girl?

Well, this is what I have to say about. Fuck that! Don’t believe a word of this little faux inspirational story. I’ll tell you what the real inspiration was: Jill Sobule. That’s right, I said it. Little do most who listen to the trash pop on the radio, this song isn’t exactly an idea or lyric that hasn’t been tried before. In 1995, the Denver native penned a song with the same “inspiration” and—get this—the same fuckin’ title! Don’t believe me? Have you watched the movie Clueless lately (also a retelling of another story)? Check out the movie and you’ll hear the song nestled in there somewhere.

I tell you, it’s a wonder how many ridiculous little girls pretending to be edgy and original make their way onto the radio now-a-days. It just goes to show you that people will listen to anything that has the slightest inclination of perversity. Not to say any homosexuality is perverse—I’m queer, for Christ’s sake! I’m only stating that obviously people are too immature and too damned oblivious to note when something, no matter how envelope pushing, isn’t even a new idea.

So while little girls and boys go off to giggle in the corner somewhere listening to Perry talk about how show loved licking the cherry chapstick off of some poor chick who probably was too drunk to realize what was happening, I sit here seething because I can’t stand the shit that gets passed for good music in this world anymore. Is there anyone out there that has something new to say? Please, e~mail me and send me something real!

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