McCartney Defends Marsupials

Put down those kangaroo meat sandwiches and listen up! Sir. Paul McCartney has partnered with animals rights group Viva! to speak out against the possible slaughter of five hundred kangaroos near the Australian capital of Canberra. The government has long claimed the friendly hoppers have been destroying the vegetation, but the former Beatle believes they have just as much right to the land as we do. I agree. If a family of kangaroos rented the house next door, I’d bring ‘em over some cabbage of bamboo or whatever the hell food those cute little bastards eat.

According to NME, the Joeys and their parents have recently purchased some land near a military base, and in keeping with their long history of passive involvement, the soldiers greeted the marsupials with evil stares, eagerly awaiting the arrival of more surly allies to clean up the mess. That doesn’t mean they’ll remain idle forever, though. A confrontation seems to be ‘a brewin, which is why Sir. Paul felt the need to step in. Check back regularly, and we’ll keep you abreast of all the latest details.