The Police announced Monday that they will play their last concert ever this August in New York. And I think they mean it.

The true tragedy of the breakup comes not in this being the Police’s final performance as Sting will surely carry the torch, but in this being perhaps the last time Andy Summers picks at a guitar in public. Summers has been dabbling in photography lately, so maybe he’ll set a camera to the end of his guitar. Those shots will beat the blurred ones your mom tries to get of Sting’s crotch.

Stepping away from your mom and Sting’s crotch, three cheers for the end of Stewart Copeland’s career in The Police. Now Oysterhead can reunite; they were better anyway.

The specific date and venue for the concert have yet to be announced. But, given the imagined hoards piling on top of each other for one last view of Stewart Copeland and Andy Summers performing in Sting’s shadow, it will be a sellout. Smart money is on Madison Square Garden, but I expect more from Sting. I’m holding out for a tantric-style marathon concert that travels to every NYC venue the band’s ever played. No getting off the hook there, Sting; we all know you have it in you.

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