One Sheet Wonders

By Joshua Tyler 2004-06-15 00:00:00discussion comments
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Josh's One Sheet Wonders

Posters exist for movies that are coming out some time soon. We have them. We keep them to ourselves, but take pictures of them to prove to you that they actually exist. Then I make fun of them. This week we don't discuss the Ringling Brothers.



This Spanish poster for The Terminal really blows away the bland, white, Hanks-centric American one. I love the way they’ve kept Hanks the featured image while simultaneously ripping off Lost in Translation. It’s like admitting that they wish that they could make that movie, but since they can’t, here’s a poster that’ll remind you of it. Great poster.


 

By now everyone has observed and commented on the similarities between this poster for I, Robot and the one for last year’s failed, yet entertaining Affleck sci-fi flick Paycheck. So I thought I’d forego a blow by blow comparison and just show you Ben’s Paycheck poster up there next to I, Robot.

The thing really worth noting is that the I, Robot poster contains very few robots and very many Will Smith clones. Is Will Smith some sort of weird robot they construct on an assembly line? Do thousands of Will Smith-o-trons go running throught the city wreaking “fresh” havoc on the city? Is there a D.J. Jazzy Jeff model? This poster says yes. If only it were true. Now there’s a movie I’d like to see.



Somebody has been dreaming they clawed all the skin off their face and they were another man underneath. Sadly, this movie does not contain scenes of Alec Baldwin hanging men off bridges by their feet while laughing maniacally. But we’ve got another cool poster for Spider-Man 2. This one isn’t painted nor is it as artistic as the other two, but it makes a strong statement about the movie and doesn’t resort to lame floating heads or cheap poster tricks. We’ve seen the half face before, but not often enough to get tired of it. The Spider-Man marketing team continues their pitch perfect track record.


 

Don’t believe Michael Moore is a cheap, media whoring huckster? Looking for the next P.T. Barnum? Take a look at the poster on the left: A meaningless, poorly photoshopped poster which undoubtedly has little to do with the actual content of Fahrenheit 9/11 and has only been created to piss off the little Bushie and gain more publicity. I enjoy a good homosexual romp across the Whitehouse lawn as much as the next guy, but creating posters purely to outrage is taking that a bit far. This poster is not meant to promote the film or get you interested in what Moore has to say, this poster is meant to get Michael Moore in the news and nothing else. Am I the only person who thinks he looks like he may have just gone poopy in his pants?

The second poster is a bit more subdued, but still plays on cheap tricks, this time to lull you into thinking Moore has something “forbidden” to tell you. We all love knowing stuff we aren’t supposed to know, and so Moore reminds us that’s he’s “wild” and “controversial.” He’s big, fat, forbidden fruit baby! You can’t miss out on that, right? Either that, or Moore just really loves playing “Clue.”

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