CB Recommends: Movies In Theaters For The May 27th Weekend

By Mack Rawden 2011-05-26 16:01:32discussion comments
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CB Recommends: Movies In Theaters For The May 27th Weekend image
What the hell happened? I just woke up from my bi-weekly Odinsleep, and apparently, the new crop of movies has already opened. Itís only Thursday. This Memorial Day weekend snuck up like a thief in the night, but I wonít complain since it allows me to take Monday off to grill burgers and re-watch Miracle On Ice highlights on Youtube. Thatís why we invented this holiday, right?

They say it takes thirteen times doing something consecutively to make a habit. This is only the 5th CB Recommends. On any other week, Iíd be very concerned you made horrible choices without my guiding hand, but to be perfectly honest, itís hard to miss this weekend. Word is Kung Fu Panda is really good, and Tree Of Life took home the top honor at Cannes. That just leaves The Hangover 2, which despite negative reviews, is still an acceptable option. Think of it like Sbarro. Sure, there are healthier, even better options at the food court, but no one can be blamed for giving in and buying a greasy slice of pepperoni.

Hereís what Cinema Blend recommends for the week of May 27th, 2011Ö

If you want to see the best movie, CB recommends...
Ö brushing up on your ninja roundhouses with Kung Fu Panda 2. Despite trailers that made it look cheeky and too goofy for its own good, the original made serious bank and accrued an almost cult-like following. Cinema Blendís Head Honcho Josh Tyler is first among those ardent enthusiasts, and Iím sure heís pleased to hear the general consensus for Kung Fu Panda 2 has been as good, if not better than the first one. Our own Eric Eisenberg gave it four stars and privately raved to me about how wonderful the animation looked. Put on your foil and limber up alongside Po, the world might need your skills someday.

If you saw The Hangover and loved it, CB recommends...
Ö paying to see Todd Phillips try again. Look: I havenít seen The Hangover 2 yet. Unfortunately, every Tom, Dick and Katey Rich seems to be tearing the Wolfpack a new asshole. They may be right. The sequel may be garbage. I donít care. I need to find out for myself, and you know something, you do too. Hereís why. Letís say I go to some new fish restaurant, and the tartar sauce is delicious. Itís so good in fact that I keep returning every few months for two years. Then I see a review for their new upgraded tartar sauce talking all sorts of nonsense about how itís practically the same thing but just not quite as good. Am I just gonna take that tartar sauce critique at its word? No. Iím gonna get my tartar sauce-loving ass off the couch and try it for myself. If it sucks, so be it. At least I tasted it for myself, and for the record, if thereís ever a third tartar sauce, Iíll try that fucker too.

If youíre looking for a great indie, CB recommends...
Ö getting Malicked by The Tree Of Life. Eccentric filmmaker Terrence Malick has made six films in forty-two years. Sometimes he waits two years in between offerings, and sometimes he waits two decades. His last one, 2006ís The New World, was trashed by some critics and called the best of the year by others. His newest was just awarded the top prize at the Cannes Film Festival by the Robert De Niro led jury. Cinema Blendís Katey Rich loved it. I havenít the slightest idea how Iíll feel, but thatís the true power of a filmmaker like Terrence Malick. Love it, hate it, fail to get it, one way or another, youíre still getting Malicked.

If youíd rather sit on the couch, CB recommends...
Ö singing along to Elton Johnís music with Gnomeo and Juliet. Iím not going to pretend like a movie about rival garden gnomes trying to hook up on the down low is your best possible rental option. Itís clearly not, but what the hell was Netflix invented for if not wasting time on nonsense like Gnomeo and Juliet? Iíll be honest: I almost saw this in theaters. Then I realized my girlfriend and I could just easily watch it a few months later for a fraction of the cost with the added bonus of strangers not judging us walking into the theater. Win-win. Bring on ďCrocodile RockĒ.

You can order Gnomeo And Juliet right now from Amazon here.

CB Recommends answers your email.
Dear CB Recommends,

My friends are always complaining about how I only like big-budget studio movies. Theyíre coming over next week, and I want to shock them by putting on something crazy theyíve never seen before. What should I pick?

Jim from Kansas City
Nice. I love the Ďol pretend like youíre about to put in a light-hearted comedy only to sucker punch the room with a fucked-up indie. Iíd go with Julien Donkey-Boy. This movie includes but is not limited to: incest, extended and uncomfortable musical numbers, murder, Werner Herzog, black albinos and kids being sprayed with hoses. I kind of like it, but every time Iíve tried to get other people on board, theyíve not been pleased.

You can order Julien Donkey-Boy on Amazon here.

Want even more viewing advice? Check out our CB Recommends archive.
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