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Don't Touch 007's Heine

By Josh Tyler: 2006-09-15 00:00:00
Don't Touch 007's Heine Hard though it may be to believe, James Bond and I have something in common. We both drink Heineken. Except I have to pay to drink it, and Bond is being paid six-figures to do so.

The Hollywood Reporter says Sony and Eon pictures have inked a massive promotional deal to stuff Casino Royale with green Heineken bottles. Does that sound wrong to anyone else? There's a reason for that. James Bond almost never drinks beer. This will be one of the few times in his history that he's done so. Beer just doesn't feel like Bond. He drinks martinis, shaken, not stirred. He doesn't drown himself in the contents of a keg.

This new Bond will be all about beer though. He'll even be shooting Heineken commercials, so be ready to stab yourself in the heart when you see that. Of course Bond has always been a promotional whore. He's sold everything from automobiles to tuxedos. The difference this time is that the product just seems rather out of character. Bond driving a Beamer fits the character, Bond slogging back brewskies doesn't.

But these days anything is for sale, and this move seems pretty much in keeping with the clumsy way Bond is being rebooted anyway. He's well on his way to being James Bond in name only, this is just another step in the de-cooling of Bond.



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