Let us face facts: 3D has hit big and until it exhausts its tenure, every new blockbuster project we see is going to attempt to leap out at us. We've talked boycotts, and written features and simply explained that the new technology may not be in the film industry's greatest interest. One of the biggest fights over the change over has been that not every movie needs 3D. For every Avatar there are five films that you leave the theater questioning, "why did I pay an extra $3 wear these stupid glasses for the last two hours?" The only solution is for Hollywood to find stories that should actually be filmed in the format so that audiences get their money's worth. Unfortunately, their new source for stories is The Bible.

Deadline is reporting that Paramount and Cary Granat, former Walden Media co-founder, have picked up In The Beginning, a feature film that will tell the story of the first book in The Bible: Genesis. The script has already been written by John Fusco and the project will be directed by David Cunningham. The story was pitched after Granat noticed that "the Adam And Eve story has never really been told by a feature film." I could be wrong, but it probably has something to do with all the nudity.

Do I really have to explain why this is a incredibly horrible idea? Evidently the answer is "yes" because nobody thought to explain it to Granat and Paramount. Let's start with the big one: evolution. We have been dealing with this issue since 1859(that's the year of Darwin wrote On The Origin of Species) and it hasn't exactly slowed down since, with the Scopes Trial, the Kansas State Department of Education and Richard Dawkins. How about religious people objecting to the use of the Bible as a source of spectacle instead of learning? How about the necessity for incredible amounts of nudity, as mentioned above (Adam and Eve didn't learn shame until they were kicked out of the Garden of Eden)? This is hardly the first time that religious material has been brought to the movie theater, with The Passion of the Christ still sitting pretty at #14 on the domestic box office records chart, but they are asking for a shit-ton of controversy if this actually does proceed into production. Don't get too worked up, however, as it's not entirely certain how much stock we can actually put into this film really happening. After all, how long has John Milton's Paradise Lost been in pre-production?