Every Sandlot Player Ranked By Greatness

fb share tweet share
8) Scotty Smalls
Position: Left Field

Pros: Good With Erecter Sets, Easily Excited, Has A Ball At Home, Doesn't Know What To Call Bill

Cons: Doesnít Own A Glove, Canít Make Smores, Terrible Hat

Analysis: If weíre judging the Scotty that showed up on his first day, clearly, heís the worst player. Heís got more throwing problems than Chuck Knoblauch, and unlike the former Yankee, heís not a 4-time all-star with a great bat. He has no redeeming qualities, just a really shitty hat and no fundamentals. Heís a complete embarrassment, and deep down, he knows how much of a goofus he is. But over the course of the filmís runtime, he improves rapidly. He actually even goes yard by the end of the summer. So, letís judge him mid-The Sandlot, at a point in which heís rapidly improved to being the second worst player on the team.

Thereís something to be said for Smallsí enthusiasm too. Look in the background of any scene, and thereís a good chance heís got a big ass grin on his face for no reason whatsoever. You need foolish dumbasses like that to get the rally hats going when youíre down four runs in the second inning. And you also need people willing to sprint as fast as possible to go get a new ball. In short, you need at least one dude who is prone to making this faceÖ

Blended From Around The Web
blog comments powered by Disqus
Back to top

Hot Topics