When a person first starts writing creatively, one of the first adages learned is, "write what you know." It makes sense - writing about what you know allows you to add details from personal knowledge. While this can lead to works about cars or music, there are many more examples of writers writing about writers. It's not a coincidence.

In that vein comes the script for True Memoirs of an International Assassin, written by Jeff Morris, which was just picked up by Film Department, according to Variety. The film centers on an accountant who is bored with his life (not exactly original), who begins to write a novel about an assassin. When the book is sold and he becomes a huge success, while audiences think that he is the book's main character. All is well until he vacations in Belize and is hired by a drug lord to kill the prime minister.

While a pitch about assassins rarely leave me yawning, this one seems so formulaic that I can't imagine it being any good. Aren't there any accountants who actually get job satisfaction? Aren't we living in a world where a simple Google search can tell us the back story behind any famous author? Has reality television distorted perceptions of reality and fiction to the point where audiences can't tell the difference? The only thing that could change my mind about this would be casting John Cusack in the lead role. And making the characters name Martin Q. Blank. And making me forget that War Inc. was so incredibly mediocre. That should do the trick.