Rant: 5 Reasons No One Cares About The New X-Files Movie

By Josh Tyler: 2008-07-22 02:47:53

Rant: 5 Reasons No One Cares About The New X-Files Movie

The title of this story is of course, a gross generalization. There are indeed people out there who do care about the new X-Files movie. In fact all ten or twenty of them are rushing to this website right now and plotting ways to send me death threats.

Yes it’s a generalization to say no one cares about the X-Files movie, but like all good generalizations, it's one that rather accurately reflects the sort of non-buzz there is out there for this movie. X-Files: I Want To Believe opens this very weekend, and it currently has the kind of pre-opening excitement around it that’s usually reserved only for should-have-been direct-to-DVD movies like Space Chimps. It’s a shocking state of affairs for a franchise that a mere decade ago completely ruled the geek world. Maybe things will turn around, maybe audiences will show up in droves this weekend and somehow knock The Dark Knight out of the top spot, but a long slow look around right now reveals a world in which no one seems to remember X-Files even exists, much less care enough about it to see Mulder and Scully’s new outing.

Why are things going wrong? Where’s the interest? It’s simple really. I’ve broken it down into five easily digested reasons:

5. The Dark Knight
It’s the same reason Hellboy 2 only made around $30 million opening weekend, even though it received stellar reviews and a monster marketing blitz. People have one movie and one movie only on their brains right now, and it’s about a guy who likes to dress up as a flying rat. Those who haven’t been able to see it because of sold out showings are planning to see it this weekend. Those who have already seen it are planning their second, third, and fourth sojourn into The Dark Knight world. Yes, the hype really is that out of control. Opening a movie in any sort of proximity to this sort of record-breaking phenomenon is suicide. Here comes X-Files, ready to commit hara-kiri. The Dark Knight is officially the biggest movie of all time, and for the next couple of weeks everything else will be stuck living in its shadow.

4. Bad Marketing
We’ve started seeing a few advertisements over the last week or so, but it was too little too late. By the time Fox got around to really trying to raise awareness on this thing, most potential moviegoers were already focused on something else. Meanwhile, the marketing they have done hasn’t been particularly exciting. The little plot nuggets they’ve dropped all seem to revolve around Mulder and Scully kissing or getting all romantic, a plotline that the X-Files series laid to rest years ago. It’s a dead subject. Hey moviegoers! Who wants to buy a ticket to see a tired old will-they-won’t they gimmick rehashed?

3. Stifling Secrecy
The production of X-Files: I Want To Believe has been wrapped in utter and total secrecy. Even now, a mere few days before the movie is released, 20th Century Fox still hasn’t handed out a proper plot synopsis. Worse, during the production they put out fake news items to trick whatever fans they have into thinking the movie was something it wasn’t, and then pulled the rug out from under them over and over and over again. I know a lot of the most hardcore X-Files fans are still excited to see this thing, but it’s hard to imagine a world in which at least a few of them might not feel a little burned by the mess. For the more casual fans, at some point they got tired of the bait and switch game and simply started ignoring not only whatever X-Files news has been floating around out there, but by extension the existence of the movie itself. I understand the need to keep the specifics of a plot on a movie like this under wraps, but there’s a way to do that without lying to and shutting out your supporters. X-Files: I Want To Believe never seemed to figure that out.

2. No One Cared About The First Movie
Even the first movie was met with somewhat lukewarm reception, and it was released a full decade closer to the epicenter of X-Files popularity. It made money, but it never really burned up the box office and people seemed to forget it as soon as it was gone. A mediocre, moderately well received film is hardly the sort of launching point to carry a fandom through a decade dry spell and keep them energized enough to support a new entry in the franchise when it finally pops up ten years later. The whole franchise has already been wrapped up pretty tightly. Fans haven’t spent the last 10 years wondering what if. They’ve moved on. Which brings me to number one….

1. The World Has Outgrown The X-Files
We’ve outgrown The X-Files. All of us. That includes the cast. David Duchovny has gone on to more interesting projects which allow him to hang around beautiful naked women on cable television, and Gillian Anderson went where all overrated geek obsessions eventually go: out of sight out of mind. As for the X-Files faithful, well they’ve moved on to better shows which have arrived to fill The X-Files void. People like JJ Abrams have stepped in to do what Chris Carter once did, and done it even better. The whole mystery thing has turned mainstream, and at best Chris Carter’s tired old show is retro. It was great in its time, but its time is long past. The world has changed, we’ve changed, and the creepy mystery of the X-Files world is nothing more than old hat. Been there done that.

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bill Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 12:37
i agree with you 100% there has been little or no marketing and absolutely no hint of any chance what it could possibly be about. there marketing has been a complete failure they wanted to keep the story secret so they can surprise people when they see it but who wants to see something they know nothing about you can't excite people if you don't tell them what it is about.

OJR Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 12:37
Josh,

I am/was a big fan of this series. And I agree with you 100%.

Actually, you did not have to break it down into 5 reasons.

Reasons #5 and #1 are more than enough...

I will still see it though AND I will not send you hate email, so take it easy on us fans, huh?

Thanks.

Jeb Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 15:27
Reasons 2 - 5 are spot on. And I'd add that the movie looks exactly like the later years of the X-Files: stupid, poorly written, phoned in, and a betrayal of the first smart three years of the show. I have zero interest or plan to see this movie, and I was a huge X-Files fan (more on that in a sec)

But I think Reason #1 is ridiculous. Lost is an impenetrable mess, though it has more chicks in bikinis and shirtless hunks, so that's a plus. Abrams himself recently watched Alias for the first time in several years and called it "incomprehensible." His ideas about "mystery" are like taking the worst of Carter's X-Files and amping it up.

"The whole mystery thing has turned mainstream, and at best Chris Carter’s tired old show is retro. It was great in its time, but its time is long past. The world has changed, we’ve changed, and the creepy mystery of the X-Files world is nothing more than old hat. Been there done that. "

Out of curiosity, are you auditioning for a slot on VH1's "I Love the XX's"? Or more charitably(?) to follow the empty pronouncements of Thomas Friedman?

Anyway, the first three years of the X-Files were terrific, hitting a fairly awesome groove of standalone horror/suspense and an intermittant plotline stolen from American folklore with a political bite more openly relevant today than when it was made (secret internment camps, shadow governments, don't sound quite so sci-fi these days). The reason I don't want to go see this movie is because it looks so much like what came after that point, when the whole thing went in the toilet and everyone hung around solely to coast on the previous reputation and make boatloads of cash.

Chad Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 15:27
It was a mistake to open this movie in the summer, especially one week after "The Dark Knight." Even though the hype for Batman's latest outing grew steadily over the last few months, Fox had to have known that the entertainment shows would be dominated with stories about Heath Ledger. They should have opened this movie in October, when people are in the mood for a spooky story -- not in the summer when they want explosions.

Rich Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 15:27
I forgot this was even coming out this summer. Thanks for reminding me

Jason in Japan Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 15:28
Josh -

While I agree with some of what you said, couldn't some of the same arguements be made against the success of a "Sex and the City" movie, which did really well, or against the success of an even older show, the original "Star Trek" which is getting rebooted next year.

I'd love to see this movie do well, cuz that would augur well for a future "Buffy TVS" movie, which I'd love to see.

Maybe this can be compared to the recent "Firefly" movie - good original show, die-hard fans, but not enough to them to translate into box office success.

Bottom line - are YOU going to go see it?

-JCH

TK Says:
July 22nd, 2008 at 17:23
There's a new X-Files movie???

Dulles Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:22

Um, let me see here, I agree with some of the numbered points, except they are implying 'reasons the X files won't do well in the Box office'

But '5 reasons No One Cares'? It's not only a generalization, it's a lame and gossipy one at that. There's alot of people who are hoping for a great conclusion to one of the greatest mystery/thriller shows of all time.

the first movie was more of a quality long episode with lots of money spent on props special effects...not very special when considering the huge amount of excellent X files episodes.)

Like El Chupocabra the bloodsucking critter? That thing has a startling basis in the real.

ENTER POLITICAL HISTORICAL RANT AND WHY THIS ARTICLE OFFENDS ME

Which brings me to the last point, the fifth and final reason which is not only lame, but also retarded in that it exemplifies the ignorance that will probably end our constitutional republic. So now you probably think I'm crazy. Keep telling yourself it's alright, or you can get in touch with the house of cards.

Ignore the Digg articles about secret congressional meetings about the 'immanent economic collapse and resulting civil war' in which your leaders are planning on employing martial law.

Ignore the Digg articles about how 30% of adults would be out of money after 11 days if they lost their job. Thats tens of millions of people.

Ignore economists like Milton Friedman, who called the Great Depression 'the deliberate shearing of the Public's wealth.' You can also get filthy rich by manipulating the money supply to move in the other direction, known as hyperinflation (ala Post WWI Germany.) This is probably what America is headed for. The New World Order is making its move for the end of the USA and the birth of the American Union.

"The World has Outgrown the X files" reflects the amount of information gleaned from the author's X-files viewing. There are so many shows out there that have replaced the reality of the X-files, shows where you get to hear discussions about things like OPERATION PAPERCLIP and entertain the notions of conspiracy within government, what the f#$$ the intelligence institutions are, and the Information War that is the battle for the power to suppress and select information. This power has, historically, ended up in the wrong hands and thus America gets the wars in Vietnam and Iraq (and the Mexican American War, Spanish American War, involvement in WWI and China, etc.)

If you take a look at our current status of US government as well as the status of it's citizens understanding of its history and purpose, reason number five makes me angry and depressed, since the X-files is one of the few pieces of the circus which may impart a little real and valuable information.

The world has outgrown the X-files. The world has also outgrown a need to know about CIA stints like OPERATION PAPERCLIP, as well as the people and information (and devices) the post World War II American Intelligence Institution swallowed and never breathed a word about (they probably would make oil obsolete, so clearly these devices are not fit for the masses.)

There is even a book called 'Hitler's Suppressed and Still Secret Weapons' as well as 'Wall Street and the Rise of Hitler' Chris Carter is well aware of Antony Sutton and Operation Paperclip... Abrams probably isn't.

Conspiracy Nonsense! Like there is a revolving door between the highest echelons of oil corporations and the CIA. What was that about Foo Fighters again?

The author would reply 'yea they were that band.'

I cannot WAIT to see this movie. As anyone can tell from the trailer, this is going deep into the Rabbit Hole. Let's just hope Carter can pull off the story of psychic channeling of information from an extraterrestrial source. And then you have things like String Theory speculating on the possibility of non-spatial energetic dimensions....very cool.

Psychic Channeling? Did somebody say something about the Thule society? Yea that's right, this X-files movie has some of it's story rooted in Nazi Occultism. Actually, it's hard to have a real discussion about the origins of the disc shaped flying machine and not include the Third Reich (as Carter could tell you.)

If you think that the wing, the jet engine, the propeller blade, commonly observed flying machines etc, are the only propulsion methods that exist today, you are retarded. Sounds like somebody is writing some history.

Drive Drive Drive.

but for whatever reason, people aren't taking to the streets crying WHAT THE F#$$!?!? Probably because they've outgrown the quest for a little perspective.

"The essential act of war is destruction, not necessarily of human lives, but of the products of human labor. War is a way of shattering to pieces, or pouring into the stratosphere, or sinking in the depths of the sea, materials which might otherwise be used to make the masses too comfortable, and hence, in the long run, too intelligent."

Hail 1984.

Tim Beville Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:22
I agree with points 2-5, not with point #1. The X-files series was incredibly well acted with great scripts. It wasn't just the creepy thrills, but the sinister messages about who we are or can be. With that said, the best way to salvage the franchise: if there's another x-files movies, recast the leads. Have Scully promoted to some FBI Academy consultant role and give her a small cameo to link the films to the original cast. Anyway, great points in 2-5. What a horrible job promoting this movie. Did they want it to fail?

graphicartist2k5 Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
the first x files movie was so-so. personally, i liked the series finale a hell of alot more than i did the first movie. and besides, if mulder and scully still haven't discovered "the truth" by now, then they're about as dense as mollasses in the middle of december.

Free Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
I am an uber nerd. I love sci fi, I collect books and comics, and I play video games every weekend.

But I am a SMART nerd.

And as such I wont see this movie for the same reason I didn't watch the series or Lost, or whatever bullshit television like Heroes......because they NEVER EXPLAIN anything.

Its just a jumbled mess of a millions little cliche genre all mashed together. There is never a coherent and believable plot, and the almight dollar in the form of 'their could be another project' ALWAYS prevents any of these things from wrapping up in a way that makes sense.

Furhtermore, go read a book....ANY BOOK. You will soon realize that the 'amazing' and 'creative' plot devices of Abrams, Carter, Shamalyan, etc etc etc are all old, busted overused science fiction book plots....many dating from 50-100 years ago.

Bob S Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
You are dead on with this! X-Files turned out to be such a disappointment. If they're lucky I'll pirate the movie and watch it in my spare time. But probably not cause it doesn't look that great and I'm just not that interested. Fox flopped on this one. I think you were a little harsh on Gillian. She's a mom and props to her for focusing on family instead of spotlight. As for Duchovny.. the dude has not aged that well and I feel sorry for what the future decades are going to turn him into. Chris Carter you blew it.

Pat Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
I saw it last night and liked it despite myself. I didn't have to pay, so that might have something to do with not being mad that the movie's plot is kind of ho-hum (think exactly like a decent episode of the show), but it was nice to catch up on Mulder and Scully.

And, by the way, Gillian Anderson pops up every now and then. She was in Last King of Scotland and a few critically praised BBC productions, which is far better than, say, Sarah Michelle Gellar and other geek-oriented TV actresses are doing.

instill Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
Is it just me or does FOX suck at marketing anything right?

LOL Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
the last one was so fucking LOL

Johan Sylvester Torris Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
Go straight to hell! X-Files rule!!!!

erichansa Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:23
I care more than these 5 things from X-File.

JImmy Crack Corn Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
I dunno, I never liked the TV show so I doubt I will liek the movie.

JT
www.FireMe.To/udi

rgb Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
I was never a big fan of the show (although I did enjoy it when I caught it), but I loved the movie and I look forward to seeing this one as well.

So it isn't only fanboys who are interested in this movie. I think the reason most people want to see it is to catch up with old friends. Nothing wrong with that.

But I agree that it probably won't do that well at the box office. Which is a shame.

Ad Manager Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
I saw the trailer several times and it's indeed weak and not very interesting. I doubt I'll go watch in the theater

Ama Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
great article! Thanks

Anaughtybear Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
I can sum up every episode of X-Files for you.

Mulder: "There's real monsters behind this mystery."
Scully: There's no such thing as real monsters."
(They see the monster)
Mulder: "I told you so."
Scully: "Yup, you're right again."

FAH CUE Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:24
This should have been STV because who would want to be in the same room as a bunch of x-files fans?
I used to like x-files when it was fresh, unfortunately towards the end it got stale, and i just stopped watching.
Even the first movie i waited till it was out on DVD.
Ill wait for the DVD of this one too, if i even remember when it comes out, seriously i could care less if i see this movie.

K Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
I'm still a pretty big fan of the series, regularly watching Tivo'd reruns on SciFi. And I can say that I did care about and ike the first movie. I can also say that I've been excited about it since I heard that the next one was in production.
All respect intended, and certanly not a flame, but why do movies have to fit into archetypes of what people enjoy? Can't people just enjoy whatever they want and not be critisized by some blogger because of it? I agree with a poster above. It does sound like you're trying out for a job at VH1. "X-Files was like, so 5 years ago!"

Jacob Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
What ever happend to that 9.11 X Files movie? I wanted to see that...maybe it was a fake....

Movies like this shouldn't be made unless they are gonna turn over stones from the series that they never had enough special effects, money, or freedom to reveal before...and if I remember correctly they turned them all over and made up a lot of bullshit rocks....

so what iam saying is that I want to see what is hiding under rocks.....

Kyzzyxx Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
I wont see it just cause its done by Fox

buzz Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
It also doesn't help that David Duchovney and Gillian Anderson exude 0 excitement about the movie. Has anyone seen them being interviewed? They all but say "yea, we're not sure about this" and "ya, we did it for a paycheck."

Fanboy all grown-up Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
meh, a big who cares to X-Files. VR5 or Automan movies based on the TV series would probably get more views.

Heck The Greatest American Hero (with or without William Katt) and Airwolf would bring tons more interest and money than X-Files. That show died with the first movie nobody liked. That's the truth and after this weekend it's out there for all to know.

J Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
Funny, I was just looking up the showtimes for this afternoon when I came across your blog. I think you're going to be surprised at how many of us diehards are out there.

Anyone who was addicted to X-Files is going to be happy for another trickle of a dose. Who cares if the movie rivals The Dark Knight? (which was awesome BTW). Who cares if it's not much better than a typical episode?

It's the fricking X-Files. We'll take what we can get.

eric Reckling Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
100%

Phibody Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
I completely agree with all the above reasons. It truly saddens me to see a movie as hyped as Hellboy II get killed by the Dark Knight. I loved that movie and after its first week, no will care to see it. The same is about to happen to X-Files, just in reverse. Not to say it will be bad, but you gotta wonder what studio heads are thinking sometimes with their release dates.

Also, to the previous poster knocking on JJ Abrams...Lost is a better show than X-Files ever was, and it's a testament to it's greatness that so many people have stayed true to it through all its twists, turns and non-answers.

J Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
So you have decided the movie blows without even seeing it. Clairvoyance must run in your family.
I liked the first movie. I plan on seeing this one. How can you say it is stupid when you have not seen it? Oh I get it, in order for a movie to be good, it has to have the same buzz the dark knight did right? Well then I guess Ironman sucked then. All the spiderman movies sucked to as well.
Maybe you should actually wait AND SEE the movie first. I am sure you will download it though right?

Just because a movie does not make a big buzz does not mean it is bad,

Bill Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
Biggest reason for me:

They ended the series years ago. Gave us a lame ending that satisfied no one, with a fixed date for the end of the world and apparently no one qualified to contest it is alive anymore. Fans are all just waiting for the big beat down to come. Why is it relevant what happens in-between? It's over. Give it a rest.

The one exception to this would be if a new movie introduced a new dimension to the mythology, offering some degree of hope for resistance. Alas, they announced up front that it's going to be a "movie of the week" format. Who cares what monster pops up in that universe if it's all coming to an end in a few years anyway?

What they should have done is did a movie released at the time of the invasion where the agents lead a brave resistance with some newly discovered advantage and gain a foothold in the world. Then they could have spun off a new series involving the ongoing resistance in the style of a Gears of War sort of thing. That would have made it relevant to a new generation of 20s while cashing in on the previous generation of fans.

Nerd Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
I beg to differ, I can't wait to see it tonight, but then again I'm a computer engineer, and have been watching since I was a kid, but whatever dis a movie that was from one of the greatest sci-fi series ever.

My 2 cents

1oddmanout Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
Will probably see the movie, but I lost interest when the actors lost interest (the missing David/Fox).

Michael Delly Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
Now if Gillian Andersson showed some boobs in the movie, I'd consider going. Otherwise I'll probably forget to rent it on DVD when it finally comes out and live happily ever after.

TimB Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
For those of use who enjoyed a TV show that you actually couldn't predict what was going to happen, therefore kept us entertained, I look forward to this movie. I will be attending the day it opens. What I liked about the show is still what I like about the movie. The theme, the actors and the concept. I'll watch "The X Files, I Want to Retire" when it comes out. Chris Carter thinks so far out of the box, you can't even see the box. The concept is strong enough to keep is going for a long, long time.

Matt Says:
July 25th, 2008 at 22:25
Think your a bit off on that one! Yes the X-Files is of a different generation but I believe it will do well in the cinema. I will be there to see it anyway! I bet the government has paid you to say those things to keep us away from the truth!!!

The Truth Is Out There!

Vic Says:
July 27th, 2008 at 01:19
Yeah Yeah, "the world has overcome the creepy mystery of the x-files for bettter things", come on don't be such an hypocrite the series rocked the nineties, and if by better things you mean the apology of nonsense violence and special effects of Dark Knight, well that`s sad.

Eth Says:
July 27th, 2008 at 01:20
I don't agree with you.

I am one of the few who thought Dark Knight was just ok... its another batman movie in a series of batman movies... Nothing really new.

I have always loved the x-files, I grew up watching it and it is a part of who I am today... so I can't truly outgrow it.

I cared about the first movie, I liked it. Thought it was cool in the x-files kind of way.

And I liked the new movie. I knew it was coming out forever ago when hints of it arose, and was excited about it. I did not place any preconceived notions into my head about what it was going to be about. I let the movie tell me what it was about. I really enjoyed catching up on what has been going on for the two of them FM and DS. It was a good standalone movie where you can really see how the characters have really matured.

Just because you don't like something or you are not interested in something does not suddenly make you an expert into what everyone likes or cares about. You assume that everyone seems to share your opinions, well I hate to tell you. You are wrong. Everyone is entitled to their own view and opinions. Don't make broad sweeping judgments about everyone else. You can only observe yourself and the small amount of people you interact with on a daily basis. That hardly qualifies you to know what everyone else is thinking, or is interested in.

Just my 2 cents.

Dave Says:
July 27th, 2008 at 01:20
"The Truth is Out There!"

Meaning: you won't find it in the show.

Diego Says:
July 27th, 2008 at 17:42

While I agree that time has done its thing, and the X-Files's height of quality and popularity was around 12 years ago; i believe that franchises of this caliber have long legs and a lot of potential for many (more) great things.

This series premiered when i was starting high school, and i became a loyal fan for the first seven seasons (after which it should have ended). And i think a lot of people shouldn't be so quick to dismiss a possible strong comeback or to compare this series with others that came after; in my opinion no other series has captured paranoia and conspiracies better.

Yes, the release date is the worst the could possibly find, but thats life in the theaters for the last 30 years or so; there is always the big summer flick that eclipses a lot of the competition.

It will all boil down to the quality: If the movie is good, it will be a moderate hit, if not well we can forget about the X-Files for many years to come.

Megan Says:
July 27th, 2008 at 17:44
I'll just say this - though the first four points are unfortunately true - #1 is insanely incorrect.

The line "People like JJ Abrams have stepped in to do what Chris Carter once did, and done it even better," is hilarious in that JJ Abram's plots are hopelessly more befuddling than Chris Carter's ever were.

Thanks for the chuckle.

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