Because I spend so much of my time writing news stories, it's nice to have a bit of variety. One minute I'm writing about a major superhero movie, the next I'm writing about an indie drama. There are articles that infuriate me, while others make me want to dig up the bodies of the Lumière brothers and kiss them on the lips. What's never fun is having to write about the same actor about five times a week. James Franco, you are becoming the bane of my existence.

JustJared has learned that Franco, who has about 20 other projects on his schedule, is now in talks to star in the live-action remake of the 1988 Manga film Akira. The site says that they have "exclusively confirmed" this information, but fail to say with whom (the studio? Franco's agent? Katsuhiro Ôtomo?) Set to be directed by Albert Hughes, the new film is set in futuristic Manhattan where a biker gang member named Shotaro Kaneda has to stop his best friend from releasing Akira, a person with the power to completely destroy the entire city.

Unless the plan is to hold off on some projects until the year 2042, I truly have no idea what the hell James Franco is doing. There is no conceivable way that he can actually make all of the projects he has been attached to in the next two years unless he has a machine that can stop time... holy shit, I figured it out.