I share a last name and an age with Simon Rich, which makes me a little more jealous than most when reading about his successes. The former editor of the Harvard Lampoon and current Saturday Night Live writer has published two collections of short stories and sold a script to Judd Apatow, and now he's pulled off the one-two feat for his next project: his new novel Elliot Allagash, published in May, has been optioned by Jason Reitman for a movie adaptation.

Allow me to tell you through my seething envy that Rich will write the adaptation himself, and Reitman plans only to produce, though directing apparently isn't off the table. The book, a satiric take on private school, is about a nerdy kid taken under the wing of the title character, who according to THR "regularly gets drunk and enjoys villainy." Reviews on Amazon have been fairly mixed, but apparently Rich is a funny guy, and he may take the opportunity to fix whatever problems his novel had when it comes times to adapt it. I'm trusting him to do right by the Rich name, even if I'd rather just kill him and take his place.