Keira Knightley, who not so long ago was running around hinting that she was going to retire from acting, apparently only meant she was going to retire from acting in anything people might want to see. Variety reports that post-Pirates she’s returning to the world of period piece, corset dramas for the BBC Films financed movie The Duchess. Now would be an appropriate time to yawn.

The movie, which will no doubt be extremely popular five years from now among women who don’t usually watch movies but do occasionally borrow VHS tapes from their friends for something to do after aerobics class, is about one of the ancestors of Princess Di. Much like Lady Di, the duchess of Devonshire lived an extravagant, promiscuous life of political intrigue. Unlike Lady Di, she wasn’t worshipped as some sort of international hero for no apparent reason. Instead ,she was often reviled and mocked by the press. Keira will play the titular duchess.

It’s based on a book, which I’m sure is equally boring. Run out, buy a copy, and read it if you want to prove me wrong. Go ahead, I dare you. You’ll never make it. Simply thinking about reading it will put you to sleep.