I really detest political correctness. While the spirit behind it is good-hearted, the true effects of this movement has always been censorship. When I hear folks whining that their group is being stereotyped in movies, I want to bring them close to me and give them a big hug right before I slug em in the gut. Get over it. Move on. White males, the bad guys 90% of the time, are apparently the only group that can be maligned in movies without a “We Shall Overcome” march ensuing.

I’m sure the folks at Disney thought the last place that would adopt PC terminology would be in the Dominican. Yet, Johnny Depp and the creators of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest have ran directly into a protest that Jesse Jackson would be proud of.

The fish wrap known as the Los Angles Times reports that Chief Charlie Williams, leader of the 3500 Carib people on the island of Dominica, is so mad he’s slapped a curse on Johnny Depp ( I kid, I kid…). Williams has asked his people to protest a scene in Dead Man’s Chest where the natives try to make a human shish kabab out of Captain Jack Sparrow (Depp). Although Sparrow is not in fact eaten, which would have put a damper on the third movie, Chief Williams said that this depiction is entirely untrue (reports that Williams was shrinking heads during this interview could not be substantiated. I’m going to hell for this story).

“Pirates did come to the Caribbean in the 15th, 16th and 17th centuries," Williams told the Times. "Our ancestors were labeled cannibals." Most historians contend that the Spanish in fact fabricated these stories Okay, that’s great to hear! I’m booking my vacation tomorrow! I was indeed worried about whether cannibals did or did not exist 500 years ago.

I’m sure most moviegoers are going to view the scene exactly as it’s meant to be; another funny adventure of a pirate looking for treasure. Anybody who gets their history lessons from a Disney film really need to stay away from Pocohantas.

How long until descendants of pirates are going to protest that their ancestors were not greedy buggers but in fact just “borrowing” the items from passing ships? Somebody call Al Sharpton, I got a job for him!

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest, starring Johnny Depp, Keiera Knightley, and Crevette’s love slave Orlando Bloom, should be in theatres Summer 2006.