The nominees for this year’s batch of People’s Choice Awards are here and as usual, they alternate between nonsensical and patently awful. All you need really need to know to sum up these awards is that Tyler Perry’s latest piece of awful Madea Goes T Jail was nominated for something and Twilight was nominated for pretty much everything else.

I’m all for an award that’s a little less stuffy, but there’s a middle ground here which no one seems to have tapped into with their awarding. The People’s Choice and MTV’s Movie Awards cater to idiots and assholes, the Oscars cater to the pretentious snob, leaving the rest of us pretty much out in the cold. Sure you could try to get online and cast your vote for one of the good movies that were nominated amidst the crap, but do you really want Star Trek mentioned in the same breath with Hannah Montana anyway? Besides, awful movies have the biggest, most mobilized fanbases. Abandon all hope, ye who enter here. Here are this year’s People’s Choice Award nominations:

Movie actor:
Brad Pitt
Hugh Jackman
Johnny Depp
Robert Pattinson
Ryan Reynolds

Movie actress:
Anna Hathaway
Drew Barrymore
Jennifer Aniston
Kristen Stewart
Sandra Bullock

Action star:
Christian Bale
Gerard Butler
Hugh Jackman
Shia LaBeouf
Vin Diesel

Comedic star:
Adam Sandler
Ben Stiller
Jim Carrey
Ryan Reynolds
Vince Vaughn

Breakout movie actress:
Anna Kendrick
Emily Osment
Ginnifer Goodwin
Miley Cyrus
Zoe Saldana

Breakout movie actor:
Chris Pine
Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Sam Worthington
Taylor Lautner
Zachary Quinto

On-screen team:
Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince;
Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds in The Proposal;
Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner in The Twilight Saga;
Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen;
Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber, Ryan Reynolds, will.i.am, Dominic Monaghan, and Daniel Henneyfor X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Family movie:
Hannah Montana: The Movie
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs
Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian
Up
Where the Wild Things Are

Independent movie:
(500) Days of Summer
District 9
Inglourious Basterds
Paranormal Activity
Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail

Franchise:
Harry Potter
Star Trek
The Twilight Saga
Transformers
X-Men

Comedy movie:
17 Again
Bride Wars
He's Just Not That Into You
The Hangover
The Proposal

Favorite movie:
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
Star Trek
The Hangover
The Proposal
Twilight

Web celeb:
Andy Samberg
Ashton Kutcher
Miley Cyrus
P. Diddy
Will Ferrell

For the People’s Choice nominations in Television here.