Whether you call them remakes, reboots, re-imaginings or re-"I-can't-take-this-shit-anymore", it is a simple fact that Hollywood loves to double back on itself. And why shouldn't they? The film industry is a business, after all, and if you have a stack of original scripts that you aren't sure will find an audience and a twenty-year-old movie that was a box office hit, any smart executive would bank on proven success before trying anything new. It is sound logic, and while many in the movie-going community bitch and moan about it constantly (myself included), it usually works. But when you start bringing back cult classics that have a built-in audience that would utterly loathe the idea of a remake, you have to wonder what exactly is going through the minds of the Hollywood brass.

Pajiba's sources are reporting that remakes are now in the works for the classic early Val Kilmer movie Real Genius and the Kid n' Play "classic" House Party. For those unaware or possibly too young to remember, the former is about a teenager who is accepted into one of the most prestigious tech schools in the country who, along with his roommate, is fooled into developing a laser that can be used by the military to kill individual targets. The latter is about a high school student who, after being grounded, tries to make it to his friend's party while being pursued by both his father and the school bullies. One is a satire of the escalating Cold War, the other would be lucky to fall into the "so bad it's good category." Oh, and did I mention that neither film made more than $30 million at the box office?

Do I really have to explain why this story is filled with dumb? Choosing to ignore the fact that it is Brett Ratner who is bringing back the House Party part of this story (I theorize that he is like Pennywise The Clown from It and will just disappear if ignored) both of these films were fine for their time and age but would have no relevance today. As said above, people who are actually fans of the originals aren't going to want to see these films stripped of what made them enjoyable in the first place, which is inevitable when updating them for the "modern audience." Also, the idea of recasting the character of Chris Knight is a sin worthy of the seventh ring of hell, but most studio execs probably know they are going to end up there anyway.

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