For some reason, the whole world seems to love Bruce Willis. Tabloids meticulously follow his every move, Americans routinely flock to the theater to support his films, and I just don’t really understand it. I have nothing against the man, but realistically, I’m not quite sure he’d crack a top 100 actors list. In an effort to win my approval, Bruce has signed on to appear in The Surrogates, a Disney movie happening in my least favorite genre: science fiction.

According to Variety, the general story arc captures a futuristic society in which people communicate using surrogates. The stand-ins are slightly more attractive versions of themselves, and this helps prevent trivial annoyances like human-to-human contact. Unfortunately, things go awry, forcing Bruce’s character to leave his house to investigate a massive police conspiracy.

Does anyone else think this film sounds like Philip K. Dick knocked up the screenplay to L.A. Confidential. Maybe they’ll add some hot, sexy Kim Basinger scenes for the male audience members. She’s probably not doing anything, right? I normally chastise anything science-fiction related immediately, but this doesn’t sound too horrible. I’ll holster my hate speech sword until I actually see a trailer.