Let’s be frank about something. Ninety-eight percent of us have stuck it in without a condom before and then lit eighty thousand candles the next day in hopes it would ward off conception. Sometimes idiocy is better than a rubber, but for the love of God, if you miserably foul up once and that sperm grabs hold, you start putting a helmet on the ‘ol soldier. We can’t all be Flavor Flav and pick up eight reality shows to support our harem of illegitimate children. Then again, maybe Jamie Lynn Spears can afford it.

The internet is abuzz today with rumors about Brit Brit’s little sister and a possible second consecutive pregnancy after the National Enquirer reported as much. The story came armed with several quotes from trusted advisers who have reportedly told the teen to terminate the pregnancy. Spears was supposedly unaware you could get knocked-up while breast feeding. I wonder if she also eats ice cream while exercising to scare off the fat content.

I hope she keeps it. Then she could immediately get impregnated a third time and just tell people she’s a ninety-fifties Catholic housewife.