Lindsay Lohan Headed Back To Court After Failing Alcohol Test

By Mack Rawden 2011-06-23 00:32:10
Actress and socialite Lindsay Lohan has been ordered back in front of a Los Angeles judge after reportedly consuming alcohol and violating her parole. Hardly her first slip up, Lohan has been in and out of rehab facilities and squad cars over the last four years as she’s battled demons and desperately tried to live like Tatum O’Neal. With a wrap sheet featuring multiple drunk driving arrests and theft, it must have been really challenging to find a new way to concern mothers the world over, but the twenty-four year old has struck pay dirt here, offering up arguably her stupidest offense to date.

I get the appeal behind recklessly drinking. Sure, it’s an idiotic decision to get blackout drunk, but nine times out of ten, nothing colossally awful ends up happening. That’s not the case here. Anyone on probation for an alcohol or drug related offense knows damn well he or she will be repeatedly tested while under court supervision. In fact, Lindsay Lohan should know that better than anyone because she’s already failed two mandatory drug tests. It’s unlikely this third strike will go over well, but hey, how many times should you really have to tell a child not to touch a hot stove? At some point, it might be in everyone’s best interests to just let the kid burn himself.

According to CNN, the botched test in question was taken on June 13th, well after Lohan was confined to her house by a court for one of her many other convictions. With California’s horrible jail overcrowding, it’s unclear whether she might be sent to real prison this time around, but we’ll keep you updated on the judge’s ruling when it’s been made public.
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