Morals are overrated. Fresh off choosing shopping over her grandfather’s wake, Lindsay Lohan has turned down a Playboy offer of seven hundred thousand dollars. The deal would have been a topless only eight page photo spread, but I guess she’d rather have all the perverts just continue to look at her boobs in The New Yorker. How sad.

According to Page Six, Playboy executives had been hoping she would do a tribute to Ann-Margaret’s film Kitten With A Whip. Weird. I’d also been secretly hoping that. The red-haired beauty supposedly loves the movie, probably in a campy, 3 A.M. on a Tuesday sort of way.

I’m all for women keeping their dignity, if they so choose, but let’s be serious, Lindsay Lohan isn’t exactly Julia Roberts. And Julia Roberts isn’t exactly Jackie Kennedy.