Team USA’s Opening Ceremony Uniforms Unveiled, America Reacts in Horror

By Alex Suskind 2014-01-23 13:26:16
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Good news: Ralph Lauren has unveiled America’s Opening Ceremony uniforms for the 2014 Olympics. Bad news: People are pointing and laughing at them.

The full outfit comes equipped with a turtleneck, white-fleeced pants and a pair of red leather boots. Then there’s the cardigan, which looks like something Uncle Sam would send to his grandchildren on Christmas.

"It is a privilege to be part of dressing Team USA," said David Lauren, obliviously unaware that the rest of the world was laughing at the States’ sartorial choices for Socchi.

Here’s a what a few newspapers/magazines had to say about them.

“Ugly” -- Deadspin

“Your aunt’s festive sweater” -- The Kansas City Star

“...the equivalent of an ugly Christmas sweater” -- Boston.com

“Interesting” -- Fox Sports

“...absurd and awesome” -- USA Today

“Overkill” -- Bloomberg

“A hullabaloo of knitwear” -- New York

At the very least, Ralph Lauren should be commended for manufacturing the outfits in America. In 2012, the company ran into a bit of a PR snafu when it was revealed that their London gear was made in China.

Lucky for you, the all-American-made Socchi cardigan will be available to the public, retailing at $595.
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