This week the ladies of Wisteria Lane are enjoying the usual pitfalls of being moms, wives and neighbors. Or, rather, they aren’t enjoying it at all. All of the women are having particularly difficult lives at the moment, and some of them intersect with each other, as usual. This week is all about mother issues and bullies
We get a quick recap of last week, and the ever-present Mary Alice explains that little Benji (some boy we should remember, but I don’t) is confused about his life, and the relationships of the people he knew. Turns out this cutie-pie is the now 6 year old son of Danielle (Bree’s girl) and Edie’s nephew (I can’t even remember his name). Benji used to live with Bree and Orson who pretended to be his parents, but Danielle got married and came back and got him. Apparently Danielle is all granola now, and she is raising Benji as a vegetarian and is home-schooling him. This does not go over well with her straight-laced momma, and as expected, fireworks ensue. Yawn… Bree manipulates Benji into eating a hot dog, and the usual results follow – Danielle is pissed, and
Susan finds her “first” grey hair (right), and M.J. comes home from school with a cut on his face and his shirt torn for the second time in a week. Clearly, there is some bullying involved, but M.J. wants to talk to his dad about it. Mike gleans that there is a bully, but all M.J. will say is that he wants to learn how to fight. Susan’s boy toy with the bad haircut and Mike do a little Capoeira – that’s right Brazilian Dance fighting. I bet they Jackson learned it from watching Meet the Fockers. Turns out the bully is the neighborhood chunk – Juanita Solis. Ouch. It sucks when your son is bullied by a bigger boy, but when it’s your friend’s younger daughter, that stings. She asks Gaby to talk to Juanita, and Gaby agrees to do so. She then comments that she won’t tell anyone that M.J. was being bullied by a girl, and Susan basically calls Juanita fat. Then Gaby calls M.J. a wuss, and they wrestle around awhile. I’m sure if they were wrestling in mud, they’d probably get a few more men to tune in.
Over at the Scavo residence, Tom is cleaning out the garage and he’s having trouble parting with a few things. Dave (that’s Edie’s man) stops by and sees Tom’s Bass Guitar. He comments on it, and Tom says that he and Mike used to “jam” all the time, and Dave suggests they get together. Lynette is not happy about Tom’s newly found “guy time” and she lets him know it. He and Dave realize that if they can get Mike and Orson on board they could have a real garage band. Lynette suggests he’s too busy for this, but he’s putting his foot down this time. Ooh, Tom, you are a real man. Later on , Lynette schemes to let Penny take the blame for Tom running over his guitar. Nice. But, Dave saves the day by buying Tom a new one. He bullies Lynette into letting Tom continue with the band by explaining that her marriage is in trouble and she doesn’t even know it. He actually gives her the guitar, and says she is to give it to Tom. She stands there like she’s just been brainwashed, and Dave is really creeping me out!
Katherine and Mrs. McCluskey are hitting a dead end with their search on Dave’s background, but Mrs. M is convinced that there is something shady about him. The two unlikely friends take an even more unlikely guest – that would be Edie – to lunch at the Scavo Pizzeria and Mrs. M tries to glean info on Dave from Edie – but she might as well be a porcupine, ‘cause her touch isn’t that delicate. Later on, at the welcome home party for Danielle, Edie questions Dave in front of the group. He is short and has a completely logical explanation for his past – he’s embarrassed by it. Somehow, that seems like a cop-out.
Gaby and Carlos are forced to sell Gaby’s beloved Aston Martin, and at a lower amount than it’s worth. They still need some wheels, so they bargain with Andrew (that’s Bree’s real son) for his old piece of crap. And it is a piece of crap. It has an old hanger for an antenna, and the radiator is shot. No, really, shot – as in stay in the shade and keep a jug of water in your trunk shot. Andrew tells her tough luck, and she says she’s going to make Bree deal with this.
In the end, Susan and Gaby make up over cocktails and they chat over the difficulties of motherhood, and of how life takes turns that make you feel so helpless. This is probably the first moment that I’ve ever liked Susan.
Orson confronts Bree over the loss he felt when he came home from the pen and his little boy was gone. After the hot dog incident, he’s pretty sure it will be at least another 5 or 6 years before he will see Benji. And in a nastier confrontation, Dave questions Edie about her grilling at the party. Oh, it wasn’t that nasty between Dave and Edie – but the comments he makes about Mrs. M sure were. The final confrontation is between Gaby and Andrew. She’s tired of being a victim and tells him he’s going to pay for the radiator to be fixed, or she will crash into his new one.
As Mary Alice closes out this episode, she comments on bullies, and how the worst ones are the bullies that manipulate you without you even realizing it. And, of course, we see Lynette giving Tom the Bass, while Dave rides by on his bike grinning from ear to ear.
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