Even Jimmy Fallon and The Roots can’t make former presidential candidate Mitt Romney look soulful and sexy… but they come close. Romney showed up on Fallon’s Friday night show to slow jam the news and, well, the video above lays out the results.

Here’s a few of Fallon’s better lines from the slow jam…
On NSA wiretapping: “President Obama looked the American people up and down and said, ‘I’d tap that.’”

On Healthcare: “You gotta listen to the Mitt-man. He had a program that worked for the people of Massachusets and let’s just say it didn’t suffer from any performance problems in the hardware department.”

On Obama winning a second term: “I guess it’s true what they say, once you go black, you never go back.”

On whether Romney should run again: “I’ve heard of sloppy seconds, but I ain’t never heard of sloppy thirds.”

The bit didn’t really require Romney to do anything other than stand there and speak clearly on political topics and have a good sense of humor about being called “Book of Mormon”. He had this covered. Actually his performance is weirdly reminiscent of William Shatner’s work with Ben Folds on the album Has Been.

Here’s Shatner performing with Ben Folds, if you want an even better version of this same, spoken-word vibe.

Mitt Romney ain’t got nothin’ on the Shat-man.

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