Who needs Halloween when we have the Fourth of July in the Hamptons? While other shows are celebrating the spooky October holiday, Revenge is enjoying all of the drama the summer has to offer. ABC’s cobwebbed logo was fitting, as Emily’s web is only getting more elaborate. Unfortunately for her, she isn’t the only spider at work.

I usually prefer to end the recap with a soapy moment, but tonight, we’ll do things in reverse and start with what was easily the most deliciously ridiculous (and soapy) revelation: Lydia’s alive! Sure, she fell five stories and landed on a car, but she’s alive and in a coma. Is that even possible? Three stories, maybe, but five? Really? Whatever. This works out perfectly, as it means Lydia will likely spend at least a few episodes unconscious and out of the picture until we forget about her and then - surprise! - she wakes up during an inopportune time and, wearing an elegant evening gown, shows up to interrupt something and throw a major wrench into someone’s plans. Emily’s? Frank’s? Who knows. Does it matter?

While Lydia is temporarily out of the picture, Emily decided to improvise once again and had Nolan discretely send the video of Frank beating Lydia up to Conrad. He watched it, then set up a meeting to fire Frank. As it was obvious that Frank would go the blackmail route in lieu of severance pay, Conrad offered him a check to speed up the process and told his security guard to get lost. Frank should have just taken the money and run. Why go through the hassle of working for these people and remaining caught up in their mess of problems, which could lead to an attempted murder sentence, when he’s been offered a prime opportunity to run off and buy a Bahaman island or something? Because, what fun would that be?

Instead of accepting his dismissal, Frank visited Lydia’s apartment building and managed to get a peek at the security footage. You’d think that stuff would’ve been confiscated by the police. If they sealed off her apartment, it means they’re treating her possible suicide as a possible homicide, right? Had the cops taken the footage, they would’ve seen Nolan and Frank coming into the building the night Lydia jumped. But Frank got to it first and now he knows Nolan was in there. This led to him roughing Nolan up at Victoria’s party and then witnessing Nolan telling Emily immediately afterward. The last we saw of Frank, he was spying on Emily while she sat on her (newly positioned, recently repaired) porch swing.

Some random weirdness with the Frank situation. He told Victoria that he thinks they’re all being set up, but he didn’t say he thinks Emily’s the one doing the setting up. Why not? Also, what is Victoria thinking, letting Frank get all creepy-close to her whenever they’re together. Before tonight, I could see her interest in him. For one thing, he’s an attractive man. What’s more, he works for her husband, and you can’t deny that would make the affair a lot steamier. Plus, Conrad was sleeping with Victoria’s best friend, which would make an affair with Frank sort of fitting. But after seeing the video of him roughing Lydia up and maybe pushing her off the side of a building, you’d think she’d be a bit less inclined to let him rub up against her during their conversations.

Tyler
Tyler’s moved to the top of my list of “Who killed Daniel Grayson.” Tonight’s episode introduced two new theories about this guy. The first is that he’s not rich and has been lying about it to Daniel. Emily caught him in a lie about his parents owning an island on the Bahamas and when she pressed on the issue, he got angry with her and stormed off. The second theory is that he’s in love with Daniel. It would explain his intentions to split Daniel and Emily up, and also his obvious disinterest in Ashley.

Tonight we saw Tyler drugging Daniel’s drink and then after getting him to a bedroom, he got a little too close, causing Daniel to push him away. After this, Tyler smashed his own head against a beam to make himself look injured. He reported back to Victoria that Daniel hit him. Between all of that and taking over Daniel’s old internship, there’s something decidedly Tom Ripley about Tyler, and we all know how well things went for Dickie Greenleaf.

Porters
Nolan and Declan encouraged Jack to make a play for Emily. The weird thing about this is that, while we know Emily was Amanda and that she and Jack have a connection that goes back to their childhood, Jack doesn’t know that. So, while his confession of his feelings for Emily seemed sincere, I’m not sure I get why he feels so strongly for her just yet. Factoring in the fact that he knows things are serious between Emily and Daniel, I don’t know how he thought things were going to work out. Was there any part of him that really believed she was going to accept his advances?

Of course, from Emily’s perspective, Jack’s confession only made things more complicated. It seems like she has real feelings for Daniel, but it’s also likely that she harbors deep feelings for Jack too. Consider that she might have always remembered him well, and then she returns to the Hamptons to find him all grown up, looking really good, and he’s a good person. Decisions, decisions...

As for the other Porter, Declan made the odd decision to steal lobsters as a way to make money to afford to take Charlotte out on a date. After nearly getting beat up by a bunch of burley fisherman, Declan gave the money he earned to them (and Daniel paid the men off to leave the kid alone). He then confessed to Charlotte what she and everyone else already knew. He has no money and can’t afford to take her to fancy places. Fortunately for Declan, Charlotte’s looking for someone who actually cares about her. Considering she thinks her mother wishes she was never born, feeling loved probably holds a lot more value to her than a fancy dinner. Plus, she’s already rich.

And that wraps it up for the week!

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