Here we go with Jen Bags and her reign of vacancy. How can anyone possibly want her gone from the show? Without Jen there is nothing of interest to watch, at least not yet. This week on the ‘Big Brother’ nomination episode Dick explodes on Jen, but not in a way she’s most likely used to. Also a new drinking game is formed, a weight lifting competition gets mediocre Austrian accented announcers, and a predictable set of nominations is combined with the power of a Jen Speech.

You may think that it’s impossible to devote an entire section of recapping to Jen each week. To that it can be simply said, “You’re not watching ‘Big Brother 8.’” Perhaps I’m the only one to notice, but the girl has only a single facial expression. I’d describe it as “vacuous.” Her eyes never alight with emotion, and her mouth remains in a perpetual half-smile. It’s enough to drive anyone crazy. Oh, and crazy does happen this week. Granted it’s a bit more subdued than the picture episode last week, but Jen Bags doesn’t disappoint her “fans.”

Who knows how funny these people are in real life, but the producers had a lot of material to work with over the last week. In particular at the expense of our new HoH. Zach, Mike, and Dustin sit in the kitchen discussing Jen when Zach claims that he’s created a new drinking game. Sweet, I’m with him on that. Due to Jen’s self-centered nature he has determined that he will take a drink whenever she says “I.” OK, sounds a bit lame as a drinking game, but it was funny. Then we see Jen putting on makeup in the other room and every sentence out of her mouth is about herself. It just goes on and on. Meanwhile the guys are drinking away in the kitchen. When she makes her way out you’d think there’d be a reprieve. Like it’s possible one other person could weigh in on themselves. No, Jen continues talking about herself as the guys blatantly take drinks in front of her. They shouldn’t be surprised she didn’t notice, it’s not like they were raising their glasses and toasting to her. That might have gotten her attention.

So, that was funny because we all got to laugh at Jen. Yay us! Then things just kept going and we laughed because of the ridiculous nature that is Jen Bags. While everyone is still sleeping she walks back into the bedroom, lies down on the bed, and begins talking loudly. About herself. Seriously, this girl needs to get some help. She has the audacity to tell Nick that he shouldn’t lie in bed next to Danielle, or flirt with other girls. Somehow, in her fantasy world of Jentastic Jenlove, this girl thinks people should or shouldn’t do things based on how they affect her. I’m not sure that words exist for how mentally and socially challenged Jen is.

All of her conversations and “game” plans revolve around her and how they’ll affect her. Except that when it comes time to play the game, or make decisions, Jen brilliantly decides to oust herself as a self-centered moron. I’ll tell you what; if this is a strategy and it works I’ll admit she had me fooled. Let’s just briefly go over the food competition before we continue with Jen’s nominations and awesome speech.

Once again food is up for grabs, and the house splits up in a girls vs. guys battle. Except for Joe, who is too “fabulous” to be on the guy’s team. That was also the word I was thinking of. Anyways, the task this week is to eat pie and determine what the two ingredients are. A player from each team comes to the podium and they begin bidding back and forth on who can name the ingredients in the least amount of bites. When you bid and are challenged, you have to get it right or the other team wins the point. Sounds simple, and I imagine myself doing fairly well. Then the pies start coming out and you realize that the producers of ‘Big Brother’ are disgusting people. Pickle and clam, carrot and cheese, sausage and apple. These are the pies that are served. Everyone got through without puking, although there were a few close calls. In the end the guys took the prize, which leaves the girls and Joe on slop for a week. This is Danielle’s second week on slop, and she claims to have barely eaten because of it. Looking at her you have to wonder if it’s slop or just food in general she avoids. There’s a girl who’s in need of a stack of pancakes and 3 strips of bacon stat.

With Jen as HoH it was difficult for the houseguests to come up with any solid game plans. Kail was the only one with a clear goal in mind that could be reached. She simply didn’t want her alliance members put on the block. Considering that Kail likes Jen for some odd reason this proved fairly easy to do. Eric, on a mission from America, is trying to get Jessica up on the chopping block. Things didn’t work out for him yet, but there’s still the veto later in the week. But honestly through the entire episode Jen had the same strategic conversation with everyone. No surprise that it all centered around her and how people made her feel. Of course, there’s one guy in the house who could care less about Jen and let her know. In a surprisingly early –albeit brilliant – confrontation, Dick gets in Jen’s face about her attitude. There’s no passive aggressive game being played here. He literally gets up in her face and tells her she’s a self-centered bitch, and if she doesn’t start having some common decency he will make her life a living hell in the house. From her reaction it was clear that Jen wasn't used to this type of confrontation, she desperately tried to deflect the scorn. Awesome.

It’s difficult to get over how vapid a person Jen is, and it makes you wonder if she’s an actress hired to trick America. It seems unfathomable that a person could get all of those pictures from home and begin taking them down because she’s not wearing makeup. It’s the only picture she has of her mother in the house. What kind of person makes that decision? The same kind who nominates Dick and Danielle, and then gives for a reason that they’re negative and bringing the rest of the house down. That’s her reason. And no, she didn’t say something different to play mind games. She gave the same answer in her diary room session about why they were nominated. Now, this is actually a good nomination. Dick and Danielle are strong players and we know that Dick plans to work and keep Danielle in the game as long as possible. Jen doesn’t see that. She doesn’t comprehend the strategic reasons for eliminating one of them. All she knows is that Nick likes Danielle, and Dick doesn’t put up with her bullshit. Therefore they must go.

Another week of nominations have come and gone. It’s difficult to judge the rest of the house too much at this point since the producers have focused heavily on Jen. Hell, a case could be made that ‘Big Brother’ is making the show all about her. Of course, she is HoH at the moment. But if this continues I may start getting suspicious. It’s hard to believe that people like Jen could exist in the world.

Next up is the veto competition and Eric is set to take on another task. America will vote to let him know whose bed he has to crawl into in the middle of the night. Oh boy, these aren’t lame tasks at all.

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