Okay, how pissed would you be if you were kidnapped because your younger sister is a drug mule for her degenerate boyfriend? Oh yeah, and on top of that, she and your mother know why you might be kidnapped but keep their mouths shut so poor little loser sister doesn’t get in trouble? Uh huh, me too.
For those of you who missed last week, Mary caught Brandi sleeping in Raph’s lap after supposedly putting her on a plane back to New Jersey. Of course, Brandi actually went to a drug deal but then grew a conscious and ratted out the whole deal to the Feds. Cut to this week and the loser boyfriend is apprehended by the FBI. He says he’ll talk on bigger fish and is accepted into WITSEC. Before he can even be escorted out of his apartment, though, two guys bust in, shoot the FBI guys and kidnap him. Poor loser boyfriend.
Meanwhile, in Albuquerque, Mary sees her mother trying out for “Sweet Charity” (the musical) but when Mom spots Mary watching in the wings, she completely freaks out and storms off the stage after saying some choice words about how Mary is only happy if she and Brandi are miserable. Sweet Mom is more like it. So Mary storms out and is immediately grabbed by two guys in the alley. She doesn’t go down without a fight though..because she’s awesome and a bum sees the whole thing. He tells the cops that a woman named Mary was taken and they don’t believe him until Albuquerque Detective Bobby D hears a phone ringing. Upon closer inspection, he realizes it’s Mary’s phone and jumps on the phone to Stan and Marshall.
Turns out that everyone is looking for Mary, now. Back in Jersey, a new FBI guy is put on the case and knows that loser boyfriend is Brandi’s boyfriend and Mary is Brandi’s sister. He calls up and flies out to Albuquerque to take over. At least he believes that Brandi is involved because Marshall and Stan seem to think that idea is impossible. I mean, the guy was a tool but at least he knew what a bad egg Brandi is. So everyone’s out looking for Mary and the guys who have her think she’s Brandi. Oh yeah, they totally grabbed the wrong “hot blonde.” They don’t figure it out until loser boyfriend is handcuffed next to her and tells them so. Then they shoot the boyfriend. Even still, they don’t know she’s a Marshal until big mouth FBI guy opens his mouth to the media and see her in connection with loser boyfriend’s abduction. But now they know and the dummy who grabbed the wrong sister has to take care of her.
Icky as the next part is…he says he wants Mary to die happy and tries to rape her. Disgusting scene. But Mary is completely cool under pressure and figures out she can unscrew what she’s handcuffed to. She outwits the guy and gets free, grabs her ankle gun, and fires on him. Then there’s a rain of bullets from the first floor (they’re in the basement) and Mary grabs a shovel to smash whatever face she sees come down the stairs.
Luckily, Stan has excellent reflexes because Mary swings full force on him. Seems they found a license plate number Mary took down of a car that was following her earlier that day. They followed some clues and found the guy who stole it at this house. Good teamwork always wins. Marshall gets Mary home but FBI guy isn’t going anywhere and she’ll have a full security detail until they figure out what’s going on. Hello, look at the loser sister! Please. Somebody believe the annoying FBI guy!
How Mary will put up with so many family lies and drama is beyond me. It’s a good thing she has Marshall. Seriously, the guy was just about tearing up when he first found out she was abducted. Stay tuned to next week for the season finale.