History is full of surprises. No one could have predicted the devastation of Pompeii, the sinking of the Titanic, or the attack on Pearl Harbor. In a similar, but slightly more trivial and superficial way, no one would have ever predicted that an attack on My Chemical Romance would be unwarranted, since that band is the polar opposite of what most musical people consider valuable, organic music. Consequently, seeing this story unfold is a bit like watching the meanest jock in school beat up the lamest dork. The shock is so great it’s difficult to know whom to side with.

Showing they actually do have standards, fans of My Chemical Romance are amassing in protest of the British tabloid the Daily News, after the paper repeatedly referred to the sad-eyed band as a “suicide cult,” NME reported Tuesday. The references came after the hanging suicide of 13-year-old MCR fan Hannah Bond, whose death, in accordance with the wildly misguided beliefs of people who watch TV instead of spending time with their kids, was predictably blamed on the band, and emo as a whole.

The newspaper’s choice of words has earned the paper a black-haired, malnourished, eyeliner-wearing protest march across London, culminating in the mass emo-picketing of the Daily Mail’s offices. The organizers, who are reportedly members of the MCR Buzznet Community and thus probably have an array of witty comebacks rehearsed and ready to go, have called the Daily Mail “the worst offender” of the British press. The 300-strong march will take place May 31, beginning at Hyde Park’s west pond and ending outside the paper’s offices on Derry Street. Whether the congregation will pit stop at Hot Topic has not been announced.

Like Simon Cowell bashing William Hung, this is sort of a contest between two jackasses, and it would probably be easier to just wipe them both off the map. However, while liking bad music is mostly an innocent side effect of trying to be cool, blaming a deep-rooted social tragedy like teen suicide on something as temporary and surface-level as fashion is massively ignorant, and much more destructive. The idiot-o-meter is off the charts here, but it looks like in a case like this, it’s better to side with the lesser of two evils. But just this once.

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