UPDATE: Fox communications VP Chris Petrikin took to Twitter last night to, in effect, debunk the entire story. Starting with the statement "I don't know where to begin to correct what is being written about a certain Ridley Scott project," he said that the movie is not in fact titled Paradise, and it won't be cut into two films either. He's promising more answers soon, and if those show up we'll link to the new story here. In the meantime, though, consider everything below with a grain of salt-- the way you ought to consider all the wild rumors we've heard about this movie so far.

The news surrounding Ridley Scott’s upcoming Alien prequel has been mostly gossip and innuendo till now. One minute it’s not happening at all, the next it’s been pushed back a year, and now none of that’s true and everything’s fine, production starts in March. Oh, and it has a title so we can quit calling it Ridley Scott’s Alien prequel. Here’s the title: Paradise.

That title makes sense in context with some of what we’ve heard about the script. It even fits with those crazy rumors about the thing involving aliens forcing human colonists to have gay sex in an ill-informed effort to make them procreate. Those rumors may not be true, but there was supposed to be an idyllic farm planet, which could be sort of a paradise, and it’s easy to imagine the theme of the whole thing being some sort of riff on paradise lost. That’s just what happens when ravenous aliens show up.

But all we really know about the plot for certain is that the Spacey Jockeys, a new alien race, will be involved and that victims will be picked off by the old familiar aliens. It’s a sure bet that’ll happen mostly one at a time. NY Mag, who first scooped the movie’s title, says in addition to the female part rumored to be for Noomi Rapace, there’s an android character (an earlier version of the Bishop 341-B character played by Lance Henriksen in Aliens) and that Michael Fassbender was up for the role but lost it by asking for too much cash. Someone should probably remind him that he’s still just that British guy who died in Inglourious Basterds.

There’s also a part for a 40-something tough chick called “Vickers” which Michelle Yeoh could be up for. Wait, isn’t Noomi Rapace the tough chick type? In space, I guess all women are sort of badass.

The other role they're talking about won’t be cast, because they’re going the all CGI route that Gollum took, unless they cast someone to pull an Andy Serkis and run around in a gimp outfit.

So I guess we can start calling this thing Paradise, though, don’t we need some sort of callback to the other Alien movies in the title? Alien: Paradise may not be the title, but it feels right.

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