Subscribe To Writers Hired For Bay-Frey Pairing From Hell Updates
When it comes to currently famous douchebags, there aren't two people much more resented than Michael Bay and James Frey. One of them has come by his millions honestly, by blowing things up for the approval of the public, and one of them got rich by completely fabricating a memoir (A Million Little Pieces, if you've managed to forget), but both seem like the kind of guys who started off as high school bullies and never released their power.

And now they're teaming up, just so you can focus all your resentment in one place. According to Variety, Bay will produce and possibly direct an adaptation of I Am Number Four, Frey's new novel about nine aliens who disguise themselves as teenagers on Earth when their home planet is destroyed.

The news of this pairing was floated two months ago in The New York Times, in an article that also described the book as the beginning of a six-book series. Back then, though, it was just a rumored deal-- today's Variety piece announces that two writers, Smallville vets Al Gough and Miles Millar, will handle the adaptation of the book. Gough and Millar are responsible for writing, however improbably, both Spider-Man 2 and The Mummy 3, so there's seriously no telling how this will turn out. I just hope they're prepared to hold on tight when the combined douchebaggery of Bay and Frey threatens to create a black hole from which no innocent screenwriter could possibly escape.

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