Alright, it’s official. Edie is D-E-A-D. She began the show alive, but less than 1 minute in, she was gone. With her neighbors gathered round her, she took her last breath. Dave had her cremated, and since her son didn’t know him, he asked the ladies of Wisteria Lane to deliver her ashes, and the news that she was dead.
The show is basically a tribute to Edie with a bunch of scenes of her “saving” the other women in one way or another.
We begin with Edie’s mortal frenemy, Susan. Turns out they were almost best buds when they first met – until Susan found out Edie was sleeping with one of the married guys in the neighborhood. They part ways, but in a fit of morality, Edie rats out Susan’s then-husband Karl for cheating with his secretary.
Next up is Lynette. Wallowing in self-pity on her couch, and suffering through cancer, Edie shows up and snaps Lynette back to reality. Edie will not allow Lynette to be weak and reminds her that she is the strongest lady Edie knows – even stronger than Edie and that’s saying something.
A flat tire results in Mrs. M changing the flat by herself. They just happen to be near the prison where Orson was held, and Bree relates her Edie story. Turns out Orson has been having another lady visitor, and it just happens to be Edie. At this point, Edie had been exiled from Wisteria Lane, and she says she feels sorry for Orson because they are in the same boat. She beats Bree up for not visiting her husband more often, and makes Bree see that she really is a red-headed ice cube.
Gaby and Edie had their little story right after Gaby and Carlos got their divorce. Gaby totally obliterated Edie in the men-buying-you-drinks department, and Edie suddenly realizes that she is aging, and she can’t stop it. Edie confesses that she’s known since she was young that she wouldn’t live to see 50. She explains she’s had a voice in her head telling her to live it up because she wasn’t going to have as much time as everyone else.
The ladies arrive at Travers’ school, and when he asks about his mom, Bree gives him some muffins. He expects that his mom is in trouble, but Lynette sets him down and explains that Edie is gone. He’s not as broken-up as one would expect. He says he has to go to class. He’s not exactly attached to the memory of his mom, because he thinks of her as the chick who abandoned him and left him to his dad. Mrs. McCluskey grabs him and gives him what-for.
She explains that Edie knew that she would have messed her son up badly by being the one to raise him. In fact, Edie knew that her son would probably hate her one day, but she loved him enough to let it happen. He leaves anyway, but comes running back out and thanks the ladies for being the ones to tell him.
He insists that the ladies should scatter Edie’s ashes, and when they arrive home, Mrs. M takes Edie home with her. The next day, they empty Edie into several small white urns, and each lady takes part of her home with them. They each say one word that sums up what they thought of her. Gaby – sexy. Bree – perceptive. Lynette- strong. Mrs. M – beautiful. Susan ruins the moment with four words – one of a kind. They each go home and dump Edie out onto their own lawns, flower beds, under trees and eventually, the wind just blew her away.
Edie finishes the show telling us that it isn’t hard to die when you’ve really lived. Maybe we should all remember that…