Losing one’s virginity is a pretty big deal – or at least, it should be. Whether you wait for marriage or not, you only get one first time. This is probably why TV shows make such a big deal out of the event. Almost every teen drama series that I can think of had at least one big “virginity” episode. Brenda, Donna, Buffy, Dawson, Felicity, and so many other popular characters eventually gave it up at some point during the course of their series. And, like it so often happens in real life, once the big “first time” happens, sex becomes far less of a big deal.

I recall being in my early teens when 90210 was airing and the question of whether or not Brenda and Dylan were going to do it was all anyone could talk about. Of course, they eventually did. While Dylan wasn’t a virgin, Brenda surely was. Her original first time was supposed to take place in Palm Springs but a mishap involving confusing hotel names prevented Brenda letting Dylan deflower her. It wasn’t until the big Spring dance when it finally happened in the fancy hotel room that Dylan booked for the big event.

The gang in Dawson’s Creek all had their own special first times. Pacey lost his virginity to his teacher. Joey lost hers to Pacey. Dawson lost his to Jen (who lost hers long before that, from what I remember). It was sex all around for the Creek kids. I believe the same applied for the Camden kids, though I couldn’t say for sure because I never watched 7th Heaven regularly. Meanwhile, in Felicity, the title character was often torn between her love for Noel and her love for Ben. Strangely enough, when it came time to have sex with someone, she ended up giving her virginity to some semi-random art student, Eli.

Buffy gave up her virginity to Angel (the vampire with a soul) in season 2 of the series. The moment wasn’t entirely planned but Buffy had been considering it. The two had just gotten into a tussle with some of Spike’s hired thugs and spent the rest of the evening licking each other’s wounds. Licking lead to sex, as it almost always does. The two shared a night of passionate lovemaking, which resulted in Angel feeling a moment of pure happiness. This caused the gypsy curse to lift, releasing his soul and turning him back into the evil vampire he once was. He got really mean, to say the least and that pretty much spoiled the post-coital bliss for Buffy. She waited a while before she had sex again after that.

Speaking of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Xander lost his virginity to Faith during what was probably one of the weirdest nights of his life. Willow lost hers to Oz the night before their high school graduation. In that case, they knew there was a chance they would be eaten by a giant snake during the ceremony so it was pretty much a now-or-never scenario. Out of the three Scoobies’ first times, there’s was probably the sweetest all around.

Veronica Mars lost her virginity twice in various flashbacks. In the pilot episode, Mars says in her monologue, “You want to know how I lost my virginity? So do I.” She woke up at Shelly Pomroy’s house after a party feeling drugged and hung over with her panties on the floor. Finding out what happened that night that lead to her having sex with some unknown person became one of the sub-arcs in the first season. She assumed she was raped but then, after a lot of investigating (that’s common on Mars) discovered that it was her ex-boyfriend/potential-half-brother, Duncan, having also been under the influence of GHB, who slid into bed with her where they had semi-consensual sex. Then in season 2 Veronica learned that Duncan wasn’t the only one to sleep with her that night. Cassidy (aka Beaver) apparently got to her first. Wanting to prove to his brother and everyone else that teased him that he was just like them, he took advantage of Veronica while she was passed out. In addition to raping her, he gave her a little parting gift in the form of chlamydia.

Whose first time was worse - Buffy’s or Veronica’s? That’s a tough one to call. While Veronica’s first-time partner raped her after she was passed out due to being accidentally drugged, Buffy’s tried to kill her and her friends shortly after their first sexual encounter.

It wasn’t often when a teen actually decided not to have sex. On 90210, Donna Martin wouldn’t sleep with David because she was waiting until marriage. They spent years just making out (it was never implied as to whether or not she ever let him get past first base) until eventually David cheated on her with some trashy girl who gave him crabs. Donna and David dated other people all through college and ended up back together by graduation. Donna decided to nix her “wait until marriage” plan and finally had sex with David to celebrate finishing college.

My So Called Life’s Angela Chase was prepared to give up her virginity to the dreamy Jordan Catalano. They went to an old abandoned house where there a bunch of other kids using the rooms as a place to get it on. The two sat awkwardly on opposite ends of a fireplace waiting for a room to become available. Eventually, Rayanne showed up and Angela used her friend’s struggle with sobriety as an excuse to get out of there. She ended up breaking up with Jordan because she wasn’t ready to have sex. Who knows when and if she would ever sleep with Jordan? The show was cancelled midway through the first season.

In more recent TV, Desperate Housewives’s Julie Mayer gave in to the pressure when she finally had sex with Austin. She was afraid that if she didn’t sleep with him, she’d lose him. Little did she know, he was already cheating on her with Danielle Van De Kamp (aka Little Miss Van De Tramp). Julie had sex with Austin outside on the ground (classy) and then had to find out about Austin’s infidelity from her mother, who had walked in on the two teens going at it on Edie’s couch. Things like this happen all the time on Desperate Housewives. I was actually more disappointed in Julie, who normally isn’t so naïve, for sleeping with Austin than I was in Austin for cheating on her.

In the most recent episode of Big Love, Sarah decides to toss her religious beliefs to the wind and sleep with Scott. So as you can see, the theme of TV teens losing their virginity is still just as relevant as it has always been. The only TV teens that don’t lose their virginity at some point during the series are the ones who had already lost it in the un-televised years of their fictional lives. Usually these are the street-wise Kelly Taylors, Jen Lindleys, Rayanne Graffs and Lilly Kanes of the shows who are there to provide a bit of emotional support and some comforting words like “It’s no big deal!” or “Trust me, it’s totally going to be great.” Let’s face it though, if this were reality and not a TV show, chances are it wouldn’t be that great. Most would probably agree that sex is something that gets better with experience so the first time is usually just a jumping off point that is over quickly and only memorable because its “the first time.”

It’s very rare that TV teens really do wait until marriage. The whole concept of saving ones virginity for the wedding night has become so old fashioned that most TV writers probably laugh at the very idea of it (which would explain why you never really see it in TV shows). Only characters like the dorky Dale in the new ABC Family series Greek are proud virgins who believe chastity is the way to go. Anyone want to take bets one when Dale decides to pull a Donna Martin?

What to Watch (9/16 to 9/22)

59th Primetime Emmy Awards (FOX) 8:00 pm
(New!) Ryan Seacrest hosts as the Academy celebrates this years top TV shows and actors.

Big Brother (CBS) 8:00 pm
(New!) Big Brother isn’t going to try to compete with the Emmy’s and since all they’d have to fill this episode is clips of Daniele and Dick bickering as they await the finale, this episode is going to be a recap of the entire season.

Prison Break (FOX) 8:00 pm
Orientación (New!) – The new season of Prison break returns with T-Bag and Bellick still in prison and Michael awaiting trial after being moved to a more moderate prison.

K-Ville (FOX) 9:00 pm
Pilot (New!) – In this new series, two cops are working hard in the post-Katrina New Orleans to try and clean up the streets.

Big Brother 8 (CBS) 9:00 pm
(Season Finale!) – Well, its down to Dick and Daniele so no matter what, a Donato will win. I’m more excited to see how the houseguests react when they find out Eric has been playing for America all season.

Damages (FX)
Blame The Victim (New!) The key witness in the Frobisher case is missing which means Patty needs to come up a new strategy if she wants to regain control.

Kid Nation(CBS) 8:00 pm
I’m Trying To Be A Leader Here (New!) – This is it folks! After all of the controversy surrounding this show, its finally going to premiere. In this new reality series, a group of kids ranging from 8 to 15 in age are left to fend for themselves and build their own society together.

Last Comic Standing(NBC) 9:00 pm
(Season Finale!) – One of the comics is crowned the winner of this season of Last Comic standing

Survivor China (CBS) 8:00 pm
A Chicken’s A Little Bit Smarter (new!) – The 15th edition of the hit reality series is taking place in China. The group will start out together and then eventually be split into two tribes. They will then compete with someone being voted out each week.

The Office (NBC) 9:00 pm
The Job (Parts 1 and 2) (rerun) – Next week The Office will return with it’s fourth season, so what better time to have a little season 3 refresher course on the end of the third season. In this two-part episode, Jim and Karen go to New York to interview for the same job.

The 40 Year Old Virgin (HBO) 8:00 pm
Steve Carell plays a guy who managed to make it into his forties without ever knowing the touch of a woman in this hilarious movie. His friends at the electronics store where he works make it their mission to rectify the situation by finding him a girl. As much as this movie focuses on sexual humor, its actually quite charming and even a little bit romantic.

Thirteen (Lifetime) 9:00 pm
Starring Holly Hunter, this film centers on a thirteen-year-old girl who, with the help of her charismatic friend, gets on the fast-track towards all of the great things that come from a life of sex and drugs.


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