After this week’s episode of How I Met Your Mother, I now know what it takes to make me truly happy; two men prancing and flying in nightshirts. Seriously, who knew that’s all it takes? Know what doesn’t make me happy? A lame A Few Good Men re-enactment by two of my favorite people. Sad when that happens.

Ted’s still dating Karen, who is still a complete douche. Everything is going really well until one day when Karen finds one of Robin’s earrings in Ted’s bed. Say huh? Ted swears he doesn’t know how it got there but Karen figures he’s cheating and breaks up with him. Ted’s alone again, which works out because the gang promised Robin they’d get together and watch her show one night (it’s on at 4 am) and now he can come.

While he’s there, he spots one of Robin’s earrings on a dresser in Lily and Marshall’s room. He immediately accuses Marshall of planting the earring but Lily steps in and says she’s the one who did it. She knew that Karen wasn’t the right girl and so she had to do something. How did she know? She has this “front porch test” where she imagines Ted, herself, and Marshall in a retirement community on the beach all sitting on the front porch. If some one in the gang isn’t happy, the girl doesn’t pass. Karen most definitely did not pass.

Ted’s pissed but he gets even more upset when it slips out that Lily has done this with other girlfriends of his. There was a girl in college Ted was dating who just wasn’t up to Lily’s standards so she put a Creed CD on her dresser. When Ted saw it, he broke up with her. There was a weird sci-fi fanatic who wanted to get married after a couple months so Lily dressed up as Darth Vader and broke up with Ted. Then there was Robin, whose poor show is on mute because Ted is all pissed. Yup, Ted is taking center stage again even though Robin has put out a fire and delivered a baby on her show tonight. Poor Robin, and now we find out Lily broke her and Ted up. Enter the aforementioned Jack Nicholson/Tom Cruise scene acted out by Ted and Lily.

Eventually Lily confesses that she might have had a hand in the break-up but it was unintentional. She just wanted the two of them to talk about their relationship because they wanted such different things. She asked them both where they saw themselves in five years which led to them asking each other which led to Robin in South America and Ted with a beard. Ted storms off and Lily feels bad so, even though she was right with each girl, she sets up a meeting between Ted and Karen.

Ted is all smiles until Karen says something negative about Lily and then he starts to dream of his own front-porch. Karen’s there but Marshall and Lily are nowhere to be found. Actually, Marshall’s dead and Ted only found out because of his obituary. He has Karen, though, and she’s just a peach. After his test, Ted breaks up with Karen for good. Thank god. Then, he goes up to his apartment where Lily has set up an amazing dinner and instead of sharing it with Karen as intended, he eats and talks with Robin. The two of them actually talk about their relationship and there’s a lingering hug at the end of the meal, which can’t lead to anything because we all know (Ted included) Aunt Robin and Uncle Barney end up together. Right? Right?

Speaking of Barney…he wears a pajama suit to bed. It’s a pair of pajamas that is made to look like a suit. Seriously. While he’s all dressed up, Marshall sleeps in a nightshirt. Barney relentlessly makes fun of him until he tries one on and sees why Marshall loves it so much. They dance around the apartment enjoying the nice breeze and when they go to sleep, they feel so free they’re flying over New York. The only problem with a nightshirt is when a girl knocks on your door in the middle of the night, she changes her mind if she sees you dressed like a woman. Poor Barney, at least you have your nightshirt to comfort you.

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