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Anybody watching the 2017 Emmys knew that Stephen Colbert would get into some random shenanigans during his time as host, and does anything get more random than a Westworld segment? (Wait, maybe it would be the least random moment, since everything is programmed.) Anyway, the talented-as-hell Jeffrey Wright took Colbert down into the technical depths of the diagnostics facility to drop the bomb that Colbert is actually just a...host, as it were. And he's glitching. Check out the hilarity below.
Some real big truths were brought up during this segment, and I'm not just talking about what Stephen Colbert's bare backside looks like. Or what his fake abs look like. No, I'm talking about how the Emmys is basically just a way to give Julia Louis-Dreyfuss all the awards. Which makes one wonder what Westworld would be like if Selina Meyers' White House was one of the disparate worlds that people could pay to visit. The Gary host would likely get shot more than anyone else in that park's history. By both the hosts and the guests.
Obviously, Stephen Colbert got a dig in on Donald Trump, remarking that he's questioned reality ever since the election happened. (Expect more from that line of humor, too.) But in this scenario, the true authority was Bernard, who ran through a series of preconceived set-ups for Colbert to dig into. Such as his "Acceptance Speech" mode. Unsurprisingly, he couldn't find said acceptance speech, since he didn't have any pockets on his nude body. (Would have been weirder if he did.) He then got to show off his "Gracious Loser" face, which was pretty admirable to a point. And then we got to hear just how great of a guy Tom Hanks is, because he's the nicest guy in Hollywood. It can't be said enough! ("Any questions?" as Tom Hanks' David S. Pumpkins would ask.)
But I think we can all agree that the most fabulous moment in the segment came when Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt's Tituss Burgess showed up with a drink in hand. And when he was asked about being a robot, he delivered a line so Tituss that you could make Lemonade out of it.
Yes, 100 percent robot. Bleep. Bloop. Whatever. Now if you'll excuse me, Ste-vahn, I got to go rope me some cowboys.
Next year, let's get Tituss Burgess on hosting duties, okay? Not just for the Emmys, either, but for everything on TV.