Don't Panic: Justin Bieber Is Not Remaking Back To The Future

Don’t panic. This rumor is not true. But it’s making the rounds so now seemed liked a good time to head it off at the pass. Justin Bieber to star in a Back to the Future remake? No, no he won’t.

This terrible, soul-shattering rumor comes from the Examiner, which is a place owned by a big corporate conglomerate whose goal is to hire random people to generate as much random content as possible to game traffic from search engines, regardless of the actual quality of said content (Note: That doesn't mean they don't have the occasional quality person writing for them, but it's really more by accident than intent). This particular piece of content should do that job pretty well.

It’s also almost certainly entirely fake. As a source for the notion that Justin Bieber will remake Back to the Future they offer the vague notion of “several British tabloids” without actually citing any one in particular. This is believable since, well, British tabloids frequently report vapor rumors. In this case, I haven’t actually seen any British tabloids rumor-mongering about Justin Bieber being in Back to the Future so either the Examiner’s randomly hired and generally unscreened writer is intentionally incorrect about any source ever having said this or such a British tabloid source does indeed exist somewhere, but it’s a British tabloid which makes them even more likely to be intentionally incorrect than the Examiner. Either way, it all adds up to no way is Justin Bieber remaking Back to the Future. Nobody is that stupid.

So rest easy. Justin Bieber is not remaking Back to the Future. The internet is, however, being remade by corporately funded trolls out to steal your wallet.

Josh Tyler