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Ron Howard Keeps The Dilemma's Gay Joke

For the last five years, the homosexual community has been battling tooth and nail for the right to get married. And why shouldn’t they? How does it affect me if two lesbians get married or two gay guys tie the knot? It doesn’t. It doesn’t have any affect on my life, or your life, or anyone’s life in the entire Christian church. If people love each other and they want to express that love in a public forum, good for them. I hope they spend the next fifty years laughing at each other’s jokes and combining forces to find the remote control. If it bothers you, don’t start having sex with a gay dude and then propose to him and then say I do in a church. Just concentrate really hard and mentally focus each day so that doesn’t happen. Telling people they can’t get married is as stupid, foolish, nearsighted and ridiculous as telling someone they’re not allowed to say something in a movie. Ironically, this is something GLAAD does all the goddamn time.

In case you’ve missed this whole Dilemma controversy, let me fill you in. A few months back, GLAAD began protests over the trailer for the new Ron Howard movie The Dilemma. The studio, cowering under the pressure of moderate protest, caved and removed a scene in which Vince Vaughn referred to electric cars as “gay” from the trailer. Sensing weakness, GLAAD continued the assault, asking the studio to remove the scene from the movie itself, leading to rampant speculation that director Ron Howard would re-cut the film. Now the famed filmmaker has finally spoken on the record, and you can go ahead and score one for common sense.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Ron Howard has decided not only to keep his film intact, but he’s also issued a statement, hinting at the hypocrisy of it all. “I defend the right for some people to express offense at a joke as strongly as I do the right for the joke to be in a film.” Now, did that sound reasonable or did that sound reasonable?

Look: you can’t have things both ways. You can’t selectively choose whether morality should be legislated or not. I support gay marriage. I support people’s rights to do whatever the hell they want so long as it doesn’t cause physical harm to anyone else or somehow exploit people unable to speak for themselves. Calling electric cars gay doesn’t infringe upon anyone’s rights, it simply states an opinion I have heard uttered by no less than ten other people, several of whom were gay. Go home, GLAAD. We both know you’ve got more important issues to worry about. Issues, to be quite frank, I stand next to you on.

Mack Rawden
Mack Rawden

Enthusiastic about Clue, case-of-the-week mysteries, the NBA and cookies at Disney World. Less enthusiastic about the pricing structure of cable, loud noises and Tuesdays.