Rebound

The movie Rebound not surprisingly follows the same format as every children's sports movie uses. The only difference is that Rebound doesn't have a cute dog or monkey that learns to play the game; it has Martin Lawrence. Lawrence's character is a hot-headed, short-tempered college basketball coach that says the wrong things to the wrong referee. As "punishment" for his "behavior" he goes back to his old junior high school to coach the five athletically retarded dorks that make up the school's basketball team; Go Smelters! Right? The good thing is, Lawrence doesn't dress up like an overweight woman in this one. If you're like me, after watching a film like this you're not talking to all of your friends about Rebound, you're talking to them about a refund. Frankly put, this is a movie that didn't need to be made. It easily falls into the abyss that is crappy tween sports movies. Of course, each kid has their own unique problem or situation and Lawrence then goes to recruit other oddballs, one is tall, one is the tough girl, etc., etc. So like all of those movies, the kids then learn to be good at their game and play it against other teams. You'll never guess what happens next: they start winning. Oh. My. God. What a shocker!

If you can call it redeeming, the only redeeming quality of the film is the guest stars. Celebrities like Megan Mullally, Patrick Warburton, Tom Arnold (who's only film job now is to appear in sports movies as himself), Breckin Meyer, and the girl that played Maybe in Arrested Development, etc. But more often than not, a long list of celebrities is a warning, especially in a children's movie. Are they letting the so called "stars" in the movie so the parents of the children that begged for three days to see the awful thing will have something worth watching? And who are these "notables" that read these scripts and realize they would just die if they weren't in this film?

Another warning is if the point/focus of the film is winning. Why is it so important that these kids win? Shouldn't there be a film about a group of misfits that get along, like to play sports together, don't always win, and don't necessarily become popular with the other kids in their school? So what if Martin Lawrence rediscovers his love of the game. Shouldn't finding that love again be fulfilling enough? Does the team have to win just to validate Lawrence's refound happy-happy-joy-joy feelings about basketball? Aside from all of the horrible sports plot, to top it off, Lawrence also has a love interest that hates him and then realizes, in light of all the plethora of winning, that she is willing to sleep with him after all. Gosh, pushing the limits of American Literature with this one, aren't we?

What's worse is that this movie is neither the beginning nor the end of this era of bad children's film. There will be more. Lawrence will be in them. Kids will fart, belch, or need to wipe their noses with their forearms in a way only Napoleon Dynamite could pull off as a grown-up. Do yourself a favor, throw this one in the trash, you won't need the Rebound, it�ll go right in. The version of the DVD was a preview copy (in other words not representative of what's actually in stores), and so what I was given did not contain extras, not that I'd want to see any, therefore I cannot comment on the extras. If you're interested, and I hope you're not, the special features available should you choose to waste your hard-earned, after tax dollars are as follows: A full and wide screen version of the film, story boards, and a commentary by screenwriters Jon Lucas and Scott Moore (i.e. they couldn't even get Lawrence, the director, or the producer to watch it). The other extras available are the typical non-Rebound related features like the trailer to Sandlot 2 and some auto-play (aren't those fun?) trailers including Like Mike, Fat Albert, Fantastic Four, Like Mike 2, Dr. Dolittle 3. Yee Haw!