If you like wearing cowboy hats and shooting guns, drinking oil and drilling for gold, then you're American. If you're American then you like American products. If you like American products then you like the Xbox One. If you like the Xbox One then America likes you. If America likes you then that means you support American justice. And we all know justice is a seven letter word for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. So if you love justice then Chuck Norris loves you... and Chuck Norris is America. That's not supposition, that's fact.
The Xbox One was the best selling console in 'Murica, where the cowboy-hat, gun-totting, flag-waving, McDonald-eating, reality-TV-watching, Duck Dynasty-obsessed, Honey Boo Boo-loving Yanks showed a lot of patriotism by buying from the company that supports the red, white and great American blue.
Basically, Americans have spoken: they like watching TV on their TV.
The NPD Group rolled out some numbers that caused a number of reactions lately, especially from Microsoft's head honchos, who all felt like chiming in on the data.
According to Joystiq, the retail industry was up by only 2%, moving from $3.21 billion in 2012 to $3.28 billion in 2013. The percentage gain was so small that investors on Wall Street are likely to have to pull a few more Madoff scams earlier than they originally planned.
But no one cares about the money (except for [inside] traders), gamers only care about the e-peen quality they can bring to the system wars threads by quoting numbers. So what were the numbers? Well, Microsoft wasn't shy to roll them out, as Chief of Staff for Devices and Studios Group at Microsoft, Aaron Greenberg, hopped off to Twitter faster than Kim Kardashian posting a selfie of a scarf she managed to turn into a thong, writing...
That passing comment about the 360 selling well is like when a step parent mentions that their spouse's kid managed to get an 'A' in their advanced calculus theory class, but their own kid managed to get through high school without requiring an abortion.
The official statement from the Xbox news wire reads...
"December NPD Group figures released today revealed Xbox One was the number one selling console in the market in the U.S., selling 908,000 units in December. Additionally, Xbox 360 continued to see strong momentum with 643,000 units sold in December, putting it in the number three spot overall, and lead for last generation hardware,"
908k SKUs? That's actually pretty impressive. Despite being the fattest, most expensive and paywall-heavy console on the market at the moment, the Xbox One nearly sold a million units in America alone. I am impressed. If I didn't have to sell blood, give to the sperm bank and donate an organ I'm pretty sure I'll need sometime in the future in order to pay to use Xbox One apps that I can use for free on my PC, then I might have given Microsoft a standing ovation.
Of course, Sony still came out the winner by selling more units globally and they're still dealing with supply shortages, not because they manufactured fake supply constraints but because people actually like a console where they don't have to pay an arm and a leg just do something as simple as save and upload a video clip.
Sony has yet to update where they stand as far as the install base goes, but VGChartz is showing that the PS4 is nearing 4 and half million units, which easily trumps the Xbox One's 3 million SKUs sold.
But all that talk about e-peen measurements between Sony and Microsoft doesn't mean anything compared to the Nintendo 3DS, which – according to the NPD Group – outsold all of the competition by great measures throughout the entirety of 2013. So yeah, Nintendo still wins... is anyone surprised?
Top 10 Software Retail Sales: December 2013
1. Call Of Duty: Ghosts (360, PS3, XBO, PS4, NWU, PC)
2. Battlefield 4 (360, XBO, PS4, PS3, PC) 2 Electronic Arts
3. Just Dance 2014 (WII, 360, NWU, XBO, PS3, PS4)
4. Madden NFL 25 (360, XBO, PS3, PS4)
5. NBA 2K14 (360, PS3, PS4, XBO, PC)
6. Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag (360, PS3, PS4, XBO, NWU, PC)
7. Grand Theft Auto V (360, PS3)
8. Lego Marvel Super Heroes (360, PS3, 3DS, XBO, PS4, NWU, PSV, PC)
9. FIFA 14 (360, PS4, XBO, PS3, PSV)
10. Skylanders SWAP Force (WII, 360, PS3, NWU, 3DS, XBO, PS4)