Gaston
8. Gaston, Beauty and the Beast
Pros: He may not have the brains, but Gaston has the brawn. If you didn’t get this from watching the first 15 minutes of Beauty and Beast, he takes pride in his biceps and washboard abs. He’s even proved that he can deadlift a bar bench topped with three adult women over his head. It’s almost as if he’s campaigning to be "The Situation" and Pauly D’s new BFF. His muscle would hopefully be enough to scare at least the more-dimwitted prison mates into backing off, for the time being.

Cons: In addition to the "gym" part of GTL, Gaston also prizes "laundry," meaning he always looks his best. (He hasn’t mastered the T. But what the guy has in crustiness, he makes up for in Italian-grade chest hair.) While the standard orange jumpsuit won’t go over well with this guy, his pretty boy looks are going to prove to be a disadvantage. How can we put this delicately? He’ll probably be really popular in prison.

Overall Result: The term jailbait seems to fit Gaston nicely.

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