Check Out The Best Lines From This Exceptional Yet Fake Grown-Ups 3 Script

Grown Ups 2 David Spade, Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, and Kevin James hit the lake

The title Grown Ups 3 is the sort of thing that would strike fear into the hearts of any sensible citizen of this universe, and several of the parallel ones that border it. And yet, thanks to an unsolicited “fan script” that popped up on Twitter, the possibility of a third entry into the Adam Sandler smash comedy series is now a less frightening prospect.

What’s even better is that the story, written by comedian Tom Scharpling, is full of lines that not only sound like they belong in a Happy Madison film, but they capture the identities of each of the Grown Ups cast members you’ve come to know and love. And this time, that includes Grown Ups 2 holdout Rob Schneider!

In terms of nailing the tone of a legit Grown Ups script, Tom Scharpling nails the tone with exchanges like the one you’ll see below, between Adam Sandler’s Lenny Feder and Kevin James’ Eric Lamonsoff:

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Another moment in the Grown Ups 3 script that’s rather impressive comes from the section of the script that shows the real genius behind Tom Scharpling’s fake script. With the dialogue below, you’ll see part of the film’s actual story playing out as things shift to David Spade, Kevin James, and Chris Rock all playing exaggerated versions of themselves, complete with the following:

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Last, but not least, here’s a short and simple moment of brilliance that shows David Spade being David Spade:

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Obviously, there’s a lot of context that’s missing here, and that’s because we honestly don’t want to spoil the turns that the full story of Grown Ups 3 takes. Trust us when we tell you that despite the fact that Grown Ups 2 led its year of nomination at the Razzie Awards, this is the sequel that could bring the world together.

So if you haven’t read the script yet, now’s a good time to back out and read it through completely. But what we will say is that if you think this is merely a routine sequel to one of the most infamous Adam Sandler franchises of all time, you should experience it for yourself before you make that judgement. And yes, there’s a Grandma’s Boy sequel joke in there for your troubles as well.

There are no plans for Grown Ups 3 to become a real movie, but if you’re itching for some prime Adam Sandler content, Uncut Gems is waiting for you in theaters now. Though after you’ve read the script, feel free to vote in our poll below and tell us if you’d watch Grown Ups 3!

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Mike Reyes
Senior Movies Contributor

Mike Reyes is the Senior Movie Contributor at CinemaBlend, though that title’s more of a guideline really. Passionate about entertainment since grade school, the movies have always held a special place in his life, which explains his current occupation. Mike graduated from Drew University with a Bachelor’s Degree in Political Science, but swore off of running for public office a long time ago. Mike's expertise ranges from James Bond to everything Alita, making for a brilliantly eclectic resume. He fights for the user.