Somehow Amanda Bynes just missed out on being Lindsay Lohan. But because we know how rabid you all are for wholesome teen comedies, we’re reporting on her next movie anyway. She’ll be one of the cogs in the M8 Entertainment movie Lovewrecked, a name which is funny because no doubt the film is about love on the rocks. Clever.

Also on board are a bevy of other irrelevant teen actors, like Chris Carmack from TV’s “The O.C.”, a show one Screech away from the greatness of “Saved by the Bell”. Carmack will play Jason, the rock idol whom Bynes’ character Jamie finds herself shipwrecked. Will he prove to be better company than a volleyball? Signs say no.

But it’s a big island, and so “The Sopranos” Jamie-Lynn DiScala has signed on to play Bynes’ rival for Jason’s attention, Alexis. Playing the role of Jamie’s best friend, who is of course either gay or hopelessly in love with her is Jonathan Bennet, who had a tiny role in Mean Girls and is now pre-emptivly classified as an up and comer.

Also joining is Joey Kern as as Jason’s manager, Fred Willard (who is too big for this movie) as Jenny’s father, Kathy Griffin as Jason’s unfunny publicist, Alfonso Ribiero as a hotel manager who likes to dance to Tom Jones, and Jackie Long as a friend of a friend. That island is going to need more coconuts.

There, I’ve done my duty. Report made. With any luck, this is the last you’ll here from me on this movie, unless of course they find a way to work in Spider-Man.

Spider-Man saves teen comedies in The CB Forum.
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