There’s an old saying that elephants never forget, but that’s only true if you’re assuming that the elephant is connected to the Internet, because the Internet truly never forgets. Case in point: here’s an episode of the VH1 nostalgia-driven series I Love the Millennium, which features the righteously disgraced Jared Fogle, former Subway pitchman, talking smack about the people who get busted on To Catch a Predator. Fogle pops up at the 6:11 mark.



This is obviously a case of the disgusting pot calling another pot disgusting while trying to hide its own heinousness from the world. (Doesn’t flow as smooth as the elephant adage, I’ll admit.) Now, technically, Fogle can rightfully talk shit that’s specifically about people who were on To Catch a Predator that showed up to the show’s filming location and got called out by Chris Hansen. That bit of televised embarrassment in particular didn’t happen to Fogle, as his downfall came after police investigations and creepy admissions on the part of him and his charity’s director Russell Taylor, all of which were viewed in the public eye and have already had a longer shelf life than most perverts’ Predator aftermath. I wonder, if he had the choice, which one Fogle would go with now.

Of course, Fogle’s predatory ways weren’t that similar to those of the people on To Catch a Predator, as he was extremely wealthy with a certain amount of celebrity to boost him up. He didn’t have to show up to random people’s houses looking for an illegal relationship; he basically just made it all happen himself by openly talking about underage girls in text messages and emails. I think if VH1 ever produces a show called I Love 2015 – and you know they will – it would only be fair if they brought in Chris Hansen and a couple of the goons that were caught on To Catch a Predator to give their opinions about Fogle’s horrible crimes.

Though there were multiple victims involved with Fogle’s case and Taylor’s child pornography stash (that he shared with Fogle), the former weight-conscious Subway huckster only plead guilty to one count of distribution and receipt of child pornography and one count of traveling to engage in illicit sexual conduct with minors. He took a plea deal that will land him in jail for a minimum of five years and a maximum of twelve and a half years. His sentencing hearing will occur on November 19, 2015.

So the moral of the story here, I guess, is “be careful what you talk about on a hokey reality series, or you might find those words coming back to bite you years later.” I really need to find my book of proverbs.

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