Chuck Lorre Uses Vanity Card To Bash Drug Addict Monkey

With CBS’ Two And A Half Men poised to move on without him, former show anchor Charlie Sheen lashed out at creator Chuck Lorre for what seems like the tenth time in the last few months, calling him “king of the trolls” and other nasty insults via Twitter and an open letter to TMZ. Not to be outdone though, Men headman Chuck Lorre once again used his post-episode vanity card to stoke the fire.

Writing at the end of Thursday’s Big Bang Theory, Lorre said, ”Thanks to the magic of computer graphics, the monkey in tonight's episode was not actually smoking a cigarette, nor was he ever exposed to secondhand smoke. At all times, every effort was made to make the monkey feel happy and safe. Nevertheless, he proved impossible to work with. During the week of production his behavior became increasingly erratic, to the point of refusing to come out of his trailer to rehearse. It wasn't until after we finished filming his scenes that we learned why. The monkey is a heroin addict. Yes, hard as it may be to believe, the monkey had a monkey on his back. Thankfully, an intervention was staged by the Geico lizard and he is now going through detox and a twelve step program at the Bonzo Center in Palm Springs. Everyone at "The Big Bang Theory" wishes him well.”

You may remember Lorre used the same format before Sheen was fired to blast the actor in a better-than-thou essay on why he should live longer. This newest diatribe may be mildly funny, but it’s time Chuck Lorre moved on. He’s hard at work casting an actor to fill Sheen’s shoes, and he should be focused on preventing the likely ratings implosion that may happen without his lead.

In case you were wondering, Sheen has already denied ever using heroin. I actually believe him.

Mack Rawden
Editor In Chief

Enthusiastic about Clue, case-of-the-week mysteries, a great wrestling promo and cookies at Disney World. Less enthusiastic about the pricing structure of cable, loud noises and Tuesdays.